I cringe away from my broken echo in my head, forcing my legs to move faster. Push harder. I dodge a tree, jump over another fallen branch.
“Keep trying,”Brett is urging me. I swear I can feel him like the wind between the trees. Running right next to me.
I push off a tree, changing directions.
The shadows in the woods are growing darker, deeper stretches of the coming night under the canopy of leaves. Every shadow seems to hold another echo.
Another memory.
“Promise me it will always be us against the world.”Brett said that in these very woods, under the same moon. The same stars. Flashes of his young face as he looked over at me, already smiling. Bowen on my other side.
My heart lurches, and I stop. Panting, I change direction.
“You know I’ve got you, kitten. Jump to me.”Bowen. Fourteen. His eyes held nothing but pure, simple love.
A growl rips through the sawing of my breath. I push my hair off my forehead, pulling at the strands at the root. I sprint away.
Scene after scene of Bowen running his fingers through my hair.
Bowen smiling down at me.
Bowen helping me jump out of trees, holding my hand while I walked on curbs, holding his arm out before we crossed a street.
Bowen’s fingers digging into my abdomen.
His tears soaking into my neck.
Me facing away from him.
Him pushing inside of…
“I’m sorry, Bowen.”
Bowen holding my cupped hands, catching fireflies.
I can hear my giggles in these trees.
I can feel the butterflies swarming my belly. I can feel the warm skin against my hands. I know exactly what it was all leading up to. The biggest, best, and absolute worst thing that has ever happened to me.
His love brought him to me night after night. Through his grief, through his own heartbreak. He came to me and held me while I couldn’t evenlookat him.
“Look at me.”
“Meyer. Look at me.”
I choke. My feet stumble over themselves. A sharp pain shoots up from my palm where I catch myself from face-planting in the dirt.
A low, wrecked sob forces its way out, and I beat the ground under my hands until all the fight drains out of my body. I’m so tired I couldn’t keep running even if I tried.
It's not until I roll onto my back that I feel the raindrops. It's not until the sobs quiet to sniffles that I hear the thunder rolling in the distance.
Once upon a time, there were two boys who came running at the first sound of thunder in the sky. I never had to ride out a storm alone.
I wish the ground would open up and swallow me whole.
Kit
By the time I make it out of the woods, I'm drenched. I was already a sweaty mess, but now the rain has my hair plastered to my face and my feet moving faster than they would like after the abuse I've put them through today.
