“Yeah, I know. How else do you think I got pregnant?”
“Well, unfortunately, there was a mix-up during the time of your procedure. Instead of an embryo transfer, an IUI procedure was done.”
“A what?”
“Intrauterine Insemination.” She said.
I looked at her, still confused. “In layman’s terms, the baby you are carrying is biologically yours.”
“Mine,” I said as I sat back in the seat and held my stomach. It took me a minute to register what she was saying. This is my baby? My daughter or son?
“Unfortunately, yes. Though not often mistakes like this happen,” she said as she handed me an envelope. “Inside has the date and time for your abortion.” She said. She seemed so detached, almost cold. This was the side of the process I didn’t like. They were just willing to discard this life, like it meant nothing. “So that’s it? I have no choice. I just have to kill this baby. MY baby!”
“It’s not just your baby. It has a father. A father who doesn’t want this pregnancy to continue.”
“Wow,” I said as tears filled my eyes. I wasn’t sure if these were my own emotions or an effect of the hormone shots I had been taking for weeks.
“Your check for ten thousand dollars is in there as well.” She quickly added.
“Ten thousand dollars?” I asked, confused. I wonder if she thought money would make this easier.
“Yes, in the contract you signed, there was a clause that stated that if something like this were to happen, the severance pay would be up to but not exceeding that amount. The contract also states we cannot be sued for this sort of mishap.”
“Um, ok,” I said.
“Once you recover from your procedure, we can match you with another couple looking for a surrogate.”
I left the office feeling overwhelmed. I started to cry, loud, crippling sobs. These tears were the only thing I felt was in my control. How could they tell me I couldn’t keep something that belonged to me? I wasn’t even sure if I wanted it. I didn’t wake up wanting to be a mother. But shouldn’t I have a choice too? It’s my body and my baby.
Chapter 4
“Do you want to see the screen?”
“Yes.”
“Do you want to know how many weeks you are?”
“Yes.”
“Do you want to know how many gestational sacks there are?”
“Yes.”
I knew I was doing everything Imani told me not to do in here. She told me the more I learned about the baby, the more life I was putting into it. She warned me about getting attached, but I couldn’t help it. It was like my mouth answered those questions before I could even think about it.
The sonogram tech ran the probe over the cool gel on my stomach. My body trembled a bit. “You are measuring at eight weeks,” she said. “And you see that right there?” She asked as she pointed to a small blob on the screen. I nodded. “That’s your baby.”
“My baby,” I said. I spent weeks preparing my mind not to get attached to something that didn’t belong to me. Now that I knew it was mine, it was hard to create that same detachment. I was starting to believe maybe they were right to decide this forme because right now, I wasn’t thinking rationally. I was only thinking about the heartbeat fluttering on the screen.
“Your babies.” She corrected. “It’s twins.” She said with a little bit of excitement. In the next breath, she was asking the type of abortion I wanted to have. “Would you like to have a Medical abortion or a surgical one?” She asked. “Both options are available to you.”
“I need a minute,” I said as I stared at the screen. I couldn’t decide on anything right now. Not with the way I was feeling. If I had to choose right now, I’d be a mother in a few months. Because I wanted them even though I didn’t have a single reason why I should keep them.
“Take as long as you need.” She said. She handed me some paper towels to wipe my stomach. “Would you like these?” she asked as she showed me the ultrasound pictures she just printed. I nodded.
I took the roll of sonogram pictures, then headed back into the waiting room. I looked around the room before my eyes landed on Imani. She was sitting there scrolling on her phone, but once she made eye contact with me, she jumped to her feet. “You couldn’t do it?” She asked.
I shook my head. “That’s ok.” She said as she pulled me into her arms.
