“Are you going to kill me?” Allen asked as he took a step back.
Rick didn’t hesitate. “No.”
Allen’s eyes moved over Rick’s face. “Why not?”
Rick kept his expression steady. “I’m not here to hurt you.”
“Then why do I feel like I can’t move?” Allen asked.
“Because you’re scared.”
Allen swallowed. “I am.”
Rick nodded. “I know.”
Allen stared at him, his eyes wet with tears again. “You don’t get to say you know. You don’t—” He broke off and turned away.
Rick watched the way Allen’s throat worked, the way he pressed his lips together. Rick softened his voice. “I’m here,” he said.
Allen’s laugh came out broken. “That’s the problem.”
Rick took a deep breath. “This doesn’t change what we have,” Rick said.
Allen snapped his gaze back. “It changes everything.”
“It doesn’t have to.”
Allen stared at him like he was insane. “You killed people.”
Rick didn’t deny it. “Yes.”
Allen’s hands shook harder now. He looked at the phone, then at Rick. “You’re asking me to just… what? Accept it?”
Rick didn’t answer immediately. If Allen ran right now, he’d call the police, and Rick couldn’t allow that to happen. He didn’twant Allen’s pain and anger. He just wanted Allen to stay. Rick kept his voice low. “I’m asking you to stay,” he said.
Allen’s eyes widened. “Stay? With you?”
“Yes.”
Allen’s breath came fast. “You can’t say that like it’s—”
“I can because I don’t want to lose you.”
Allen stared at him, his mouth falling open. Rick stepped closer and lifted his hand toward Allen’s face. He paused before touching him, letting Allen pull away if he wanted, but Allen didn’t move. Rick’s fingers brushed Allen’s jaw. Allen shivered, and his eyes squeezed shut for a second.
“You’re real,” Rick said quietly. “Do you understand that?”
Allen’s eyes opened again. “What does that even mean?”
“It means you see me,” Rick said. “Not the show. Not the name. You look at me like I’m just a man.”
Allen’s mouth trembled. “You’re not just a man.”
Rick’s gaze stayed locked on him. “With you I am.”
Allen swallowed and looked away, then back again. He exhaled heavily and rubbed a hand over his face. “I don’t...” he trailed off.
Rick kept his hand on his jaw. “They weren’t going to stop,” Rick said. “Cass wasn’t going to stop. Elliot wasn’t going to stop. You don’t know what it’s like to be owned by other people and have them laugh while they do it.”
