‘This isn’t neutral. This is my home, Nico. It used to be yours, or rather ours, and you are always welcome here. I’m sorry you avoid the ocean these days, but of course I understand it. I have also had to come to terms with what happened out there. I’m not saying my pain is greater than yours, but Theo’s accident broke my heart.’ Her eyes seemed to look into his soul as memories he’d been suppressing flooded in. He relived the adrenaline spike as he stood helpless and stranded on the ski after employing the kill cord, rewinding through the arrival of the coastguard and the emergency services. Water and blood, sunshine and darkness. He took a deep breath and pushed it out. Noticing this, she moved into a meditative posture. ‘Let’s do some breathing for a while. In and out. That’s all you have to concentrate on. Let the body and mind be one.’
***
When he’d calmed, they sat and chatted. She kept her legs crossed while he pushed his toes into the sand. ‘I was expecting you to be angry. To be honest, I didn’t even think you’d want to talk. Thought maybe you’d hang up on me or not answer at all.’
She took his hand. ‘It’s the opposite, actually. I’m glad you rang. Theo has been bugging me to get in touch. He’s beencalling twice a week, giving me reasons why you and I need to kiss and make up. I was working up the nerve to reach out but hadn’t quite got there yet. I said some terrible things, Nico. I know about everything you’ve done to help him, like allowing him time off to recover and then to resign without acrimony. And, of course, I know how many hours you spent with him in hospital and rehab. He is your biggest fan and made me feel very petty for what I said.’
‘You told me I should be prosecuted for negligence. At one point, you even accused me of being drunk at the wheel. I promise you again, hand on heart, I hadn’t had a drink.’
‘I was angry, felt it needed to be said at the time, although I don’t think that now.’
He wasn’t ready to let her off the hook. ‘Then there were the phone calls when you ranted and raved and said you wished you’d only had one son.’
‘I’m his mother. I couldn’t talk to him about it, and your father was busy with child number…whatever. I needed to vent, and I took it out on you. I’ve meditated on it a lot. I’m running yoga weekend escapes now. They’re quite successful.’ She pulled a plastic bag out of her handbag, with two neatly cut rounds of sandwiches. ‘I know you like egg mayonnaise.’
‘Honestly? You want to talk about sandwiches right now?’
‘Is Theo eating well, do you know? I’ve sent food parcels.’ Her face creased with worry, the same look she’d worn whenever he saw her in the hospital.
‘I’m surprised he accepted them. He has pride, and he isn’t a kid.’
‘You’re both still my children.’ The sun came out again. She held out a sandwich. ‘Peace offering?’
***
An hour later, they retired to a café and watched tourists queue up for ice cream in the rain. ‘You and Theo spent hours in rockpools when you were little. Do you remember coming down here in the school holidays?’
‘Of course I do. Remember that leaping frog game we used to play? Where I encouraged him to leap too high and he chipped his tooth on a rock? My fault as well, I suppose.’ Nic sighed.
His mother tutted. ‘Theo’s accident was not your fault, Nico, despite what I might have said at the time. I was distraught and lashed out at you.
Nic’s phone rang and he checked the screen, relieved to see Aria’s name. But this conversation was too important to interrupt.
‘Do you need to get that?’ his mum asked.
‘I’ll call her back.’
‘Someone special?’
Nic smiled at her question, but stayed silent, turning his phone around in his palm.
‘You don’t have to tell me. But don’t be like your father, Nico,’ she said. ‘Find someone you love and establish a balanced and trusting relationship. Go all in, and don’t throw her scraps of you.’ Her coffee came and she graciously thanked the waitress. ‘And I hope it goes without saying you shouldn’tcheat. Bring her to see me sometime. Theo tells me you and your father are talking again. It’s no surprise. We’re all drawn together by a web of memories.’ She took a sip of her drink. ‘Our shared experiences, photographs and stories prop us up when we are sad, ground us when we are lonely and cradle us when we are dying.’
‘God, Mum, you’ve gone really zen.’
His phone rang again.
‘Theo’s thinking of relocating here eventually,’ she said, ‘helping me at the hotel and living a quieter life. I think he may also have a girlfriend he’s not telling me about. Maybe he can manage the business, and I can go travelling. But when I die, you’ll get an equal share. I’ll never forget the work you put in to build the place. It almost broke your back.’
‘On the contrary, I think it gave me a backbone. Flipping that property started my career. Butyouwere a pain in my back-side. You said the hotels on the prom were garish, so I painted the place white for you and then you decided you wanted it redone yellow.’
‘Theo told me about your new development. I’m proud of you, Nic.’ As his phone stopped buzzing, his mother put her hand on his shoulder. ‘Want to have dinner and talk some more? Stay the night, maybe? You can fix…’
‘That stupid cupboard? I don’t know why you don’t replace them.’
‘I was going to say you could fix us some cocktails, but if you feel inclined to pick up a screwdriver, I won’t object. How did you know it needed mending?’
‘Things never change around here.’
