‘Whatever it is you want to say but are too afraid to.’
‘What you and Benji get up to is none of my business, Sierra. You’re adults.’
‘But?’
Mav sat up straight. He ran one hand tiredly over his eyes.
‘I can take it,’ Sierra informed him.
‘I know you can, Si,’ he said quietly. Slowly. As if he were carefully choosing his words. ‘Please … Be careful with him.’ Because Poppy was listening, Mav stood and came to her, dislodging Shadow, who flopped onto her side and promptly went back to sleep. He lowered his voice. ‘Benji doesn’t know how to protect himself against you.’
It hurt that Mav thought she was the problem. But only because she knew that it was true. ‘I tried to keep him at a distance,’ she replied, her voice barely a whisper. ‘I tried so hard.’ She turned on him, her eyes full of fire and panic. ‘But I’m only human too, Mav. And Benji … He makes it so difficult to stay away. He’s …’ Sierra straightened. ‘He’s the only man I’ve ever loved.’
‘Okay, ouch,’ Mav said, trying to lighten the mood.
Sierra smiled despite her fear. ‘You know what I mean.’
He sighed. ‘I do. And I suppose I always knew you two would end up here again. But it’s just tough to see the people you love suffer. Jesus, Si, watching you and Benji the past year has been hell. And I’m happy for you – both of you. But I’m scared for you too. You’re my baby sister. He’s my best friend. And you’ve both been through so much. Just … be careful,’ he reiterated. ‘Okay?’
‘I’ll try. I’ve told him I’m not looking for anything more.’
Maverick released a bark of laughter. ‘How did that go for you?’
Sierra raised the picnic basket. ‘How do you think it went?’
‘He’s always been good at quietly going after what he wants.’
‘Yup,’ she agreed. ‘And, worse, he makes you think it was your idea the whole time.’
‘Yeah,’ he laughed. ‘Exactly’. Maverick put his beer down on the porch rail. He took the basket from her and then surprised her by pulling her into a hug. ‘I’m sorry, Si. For everything. I would take it from you if I could.’
Sierra buried her face in his shoulder. ‘Don’t say that,’ she begged. The thought of her brother going through what she had made her feel sick to her stomach.
He gave her a squeeze, but it was only once he had stepped back that Sierra realized that she couldn’t remember the last time she’d accepted a hug from him. Oh, Mav had tried in those first few weeks After. But Sierra hadn’t wanted to be comforted. She had wanted to move on and so had rejected anyone who had tried to lend her a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen to her rage-filled ranting. And now, she realized how much Mav must have hurt too, and she wondered if, maybe, it would have been easier to cope if she’d allowed everyone to grieve with her.
She didn’t have time to ponder it further as Benji drove up and parked beneath the big oak tree. He got out, and as he walked to her, his long legs eating up the space between them quickly, Sierra’s heart pattered with excitement.
Poppy exclaimed, ‘Uncle Benji!’ and ran down the front steps to jump into his arms.
‘Hi, bub!’ Benji swung Poppy around until she was giggling hysterically.
It hurt to watch them, to imagine all those unlived moments they might have had with their own daughter. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ Sierra told Mav.
‘Yeah. Have fun.’ Mav passed the picnic basket back to her and then waved to Benji as he approached.
‘How’re you doing?’ Benji climbed the porch steps and put Poppy down. His green eyes scanned Mav from head to toe. Assessing. Watching. Protecting.
‘Better.’ Maverick gestured to the beer on the porch rail. ‘Finally allowed to drink again, which is making recovery a little more manageable.’
‘They say when you can ride again?’
‘Few weeks. But I promised Nina I’d wait until after New Year’s, except for some still shots for the wedding photos.’ He grinned. ‘If I loved her any less, I’d be really sick of her coddling by now.’
‘You love it,’ Sierra accused.
‘No. I loveher,’ he corrected. ‘And even then, if she makes me eat soup one more time, I’m going to throw a tantrum.’
‘Need me to break you out?’ Benji asked. ‘We can head out, get a drink. If you’re good we can even stop and pee on the side of the road like the rough, rugged men we are.’
