“I love you, Mason, but we need sleep. I think a war is coming. Don’t you feel it?”
I squeeze Parker’s hand but don’t answer him, just waiting for him to fall asleep on the other side of his best friend. The air is electric, and the hair on my neck stands on end. I dofeel it. In my bones. Something or someone is after us, and Claude is a stopgap until we can figure out where to go from here.
But it’s not just the four of them anymore—they’ve got Reid and me as well. I’ve ached to have a family for so many years, never feeling enough for Reid, or even for myself, and I can’t help but find it a little ironic that I found family among these murderers filled with honor. After all, I’m one of them now too. If one of them goes down, we all do. That’s the rule now.
My brain is quiet and happy as I fall asleep with Parker’s hand in mine, seeking out that one more touch that’ll do the trick. Quiet and lovely, that’s what Parker’s love is to me. And then we sleep.
EPILOGUE
MASON
One Week Later
Time has never moved so slow, even counting that first week after my parents died. Each day that goes by, the boys pull further apart, distanced in some way that feels like it’s my fault, but it’s not.Just the anxiety, I remind myself as I thoroughly clean the kitchen for the fourth time this week. At least Parker doesn’t say anything, doesn’t give me odd looks, he just accepts my need to clean as part of mywhat the fuck do I do with all these anxious thoughts in my brainprocess.
“I’m going to grab the last of my stuff today,” Parker says from where he leans against the kitchen doorway.
“Oh?” I ask, rubbing my chin against my shoulder.
Parker smiles sweetly. “I want to live here, and the boys will get used to it.”
“Maybe,” I murmur grumpily, unsure if Jacob will ever forgive me.
“Jacob will get over it,” Parker says as if reading my mind.
I narrow my eyes. “Are you sure?”
Parker just tucks his hands into his dress pants, showing off those epic forearms of his that I’ll always be obsessed with. He catches me staring at said forearms and his smile grows a little more teasing, and even a little sexy. He likes when I ogle him, even if nothing is going to come from it. And I like ogling Parker, I like looking at him, thinking about all the things we can do one day if my brain lets me. But it’s also nice to know that it’s not a requirement to ever do anything if I don’t want to because he loves me as I am.
Parker loves me. How odd.
I toss the wet sponge into the sink and turn around, leaning my back against the cold granite. Parker stays where he is, patient as always, waiting to see what I’m willing to give today. And the anxiety is high enough that I’m not willing to give anything except to look and maybe be ogled in return.
“You know,” Parker says with a teasing lilt to his voice, “maybe we should have our own signals, like what you and Reid have.”
There goes my heart.
“Yeah?” I ask, voice breaking on the word.
Parker grins like a schoolboy with his first crush. “Yeah.” Parker tilts his head, studying me like he always does. He lifts his hand and taps just over his heart. “This means I wish I could hold you.” Parker trails his fingers over his chest to tap them against his throat, where his blood pounds away. “This means I’m thinking about doing very dirty, dirty things to you.” He slowly trails his fingers up to his lips, pressing a kiss to his finger. “And this means I want to kiss you so badly it hurts.”
Don’t cry, I tell myself. Fucking romantic asshole.
“Which one do you feel right now?”
Parker’s grin turns shy. “All three?”
“Oh fuck you!” I shout through laughter.
And that makes Parker’s grin turn even broader as he tucks his hands back into his pants. “Want to come with me to grab my stuff? Maybe you can see Reid?”
“I can’t clean anymore, so… sure. Why not?”
“That’s the spirit.”
Parker tugs on his jacket that hangs beside mine at the front door. I stare at my hoodie for a moment, the one I stole from Parker and never returned, the one that smells like him and me combined. Parker tilts his head at me as I continue to stare.
“Will you put my hoodie on for me?”
