“We can cancel all this if you don’t want to go through with it. You still have time to change your mind.” Parker’s eyes flit between mine, a careful caress without touch. “But I’ve thought about this a lot, and I think it would help, in an insane sort of way. It helps me… to kill sometimes. So anyway…”
Oh. Parker is so genuine with his answer that my heart races a little bit. There are so many nuances to him I’ve yet to meet, I could probably spend a long time charting a path through to discover.
“No!” I shout, but I soften my voice when his eyes widen. “No. I want to do it. I’m not changing my mind. I’m just getting nervous, which is my standard level of emotion. There’s nervous, then there’s anxiety attack, then there’s the panic. Nervous is fine.”
Parker looks at me almost… fondly. “All right then, let’s go.”
I take a deep breath as I follow Parker down the stairs, tryingveryhard not to look at his ass in his own bespoke outfit. Parker helps me into the passenger seat like usual, then dips down a little to look me in the eye. He seems excited.
“I forgot the best part.” Parker reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a pair of leather gloves. “This way you shouldn’t get triggered if you have to touch something. Plus, no prints left behind.”
I touch the supple leather with a soft smile. “Oh.”
“By the way, Jacob usually sits here, so you might get some ribbing. Just ignore them all.”
I blink slowly at him. “Okay. Jacob can sit here…”
Parker shakes his head furiously. “Nope, no one will touch you up here.”
Then Parker slams the door with finality. Oh. Does he mean that for my OCD or does he mean that because he doesn’t want anyone touching me? Anyone that isn’t him. I watch him out of the corner of my eye as he pulls out of the driveway to head toward the other house. His lightly muscled arms bunch as he turns the car, making that helpless young gay man inside me want to scream. Why are arms so sexy?
Parker puts on some grunge-sounding rock music, then flicks me a smile. “Nolan Hastings, I love him.”
“I’m more of a pop guy.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll learn.” Parker shoots me a devastatingsmile before turning the music up. The guy’s voice is deep, reminiscent of singers from the early nineties. Parker taps the steering wheel along with the beat, his mouth softly mouthing the lyrics as well. That’s kind of sexy too.
The door to the house swings open the minute we pull up front. Dante holds the door open for Reid, who is dressed like his boyfriend, like Parker said, and then Hayden and Jacob follow. How are they all going to fit? My question is answered when Jacob opens the door for Hayden, who slides into the middle seat like it was made for him. Dante and Jacob flank him, then Reid clamors in straight onto Dante’s lap. That cannot be safe. If we stop at a red light beside a cop, we’re definitely going to get a ticket, which will blow the entire mission.
“Is that safe?—”
“Well, I’d have a seat if you weren’t joining us,” Reid interrupts me with a steely edge to his voice.
I turn around to glare at him. “Parker invited me, so take it up with him if you don’t want me here.”
Dante digs his fingers into Reid’s arms, which seems to simultaneously calm and frustrate Reid further. But he shuts up all the same. I don’t even know what the damn mission is for. Or protocol. Sweat starts to dampen the back of my neck, but when I look toward Parker, he shoots me a reassuring smile that I feel all the way in my bones. Parker won’t let anything bad happen to me, and he won’t let me mess up.
Parker pulls off the highway thirty minutes later, dumping us straight into the suburbs. The bright lights of the city have faded. Moonshine guides our way as the streetlights are placed farther and farther apart. My anxiety mutes a little at the thrill of the mission that’s about to unfold before us. Maybe killing bad guys is therapeutic?
Finally, Parker pulls into a dark industrial center, only the light of the moon guiding our way to a deserted parking lot. Despite the barren surroundings, Parker parks the car at the back of the lot, closest to the exit. Hayden leans forward in the dark of the car with a plucky smile that sends a shiver of trepidation down my spine.
“Welcome to the shit show,” Hayden sings. Jacob elbows him in the ribs, which makes Hayden shoot the other man a glare. “Fuck off, Jacob. Now listen up, perky. Parker is responsible for you on this one, so if you blow it, I’ll punish Parker for atleasta month by putting him on protection duty for me, which is his least favorite duty.”
What? I shake my head at all his words. “Okay?”
“Good.” Hayden leans forward and slips a gun into my holster without touching me. “Safety is on. I know you’ve handled a gun before since you killed your uncle. Have you handled one prior to that?”
“Uh…”
Hayden’s head snaps to Parker. “Are you fucking for real?”
Parker spins in his seat to glare at Hayden. “Stop being a little shit. I said I’ve got his six, that’s all that matters. Got it?”
They stare each other down for a few long moments before Jacob leans forward, effectively jostling Hayden out of my line of vision.
“You got it, Parker. The boss just wants us to be safe.”
Parker deflates a little and nods, then hops out of the car. He makes his way to the passenger door and opens it for me, lines of his body taut, jaw tight. I hop out and stand in front of him, staring up at him in the pitch-black cover for the mission.
