Time slows to a crawl. I’m just about to go back out to the living room, demanding something stupid from Benji, when he barrels into the bedroom. I have a split second to gather that he’s shirtless, ratty jeans unbuttoned but hanging on to his hips. My teeth gnash with the force of his shove as I fall onto the bed. His fingers dig into my shoulders as he shoves me down.
“Stop!” I yell, feeling some weird joy at this role play.
“No,” Benji growls into my ear. His skin is molten lava against my own. A shiver rolls through me when his hand rips at my shorts, tugging them down until the cool air of the hotel room slaps the bare skin of my ass.
I try to elbow him, get him to stop, but he just presses me down onto the bed harder. His hand comes around to roughly grab my throat. He squeezes so hard that I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to swallow again.
My head spins when he wraps his other arm around my middle, tugging me up until I’m on my knees. I fight him, trying to get leverage to kick him off of me, but he’s got enough weight on me that it’s impossible to move him. He’s a rock, immovable. His hand squeezes my throat again just as his cock notches against my hole. Benji doesn’t even wait, he just pushes in, ignoring the resistance as my body fights me to relax. It hurts, but exactly the kind of pain I want.
“No, please,” I whimper, but I’m not asking him to stop fucking me. I’m asking him to stop invading all my senses, stop making things seemeasywhen really they’re fucking hard. Everything is so fucking hard. Everything is so exhausting. My body feels like it weighs ten thousand pounds as he pushes me harder into the bed.
Benji is abnormally quiet as he fucks me, even when he bites hard at the sliver of skin between my neck and shoulder blade, his favorite place to bite. By the time he leaves, there’ll be permanent imprints of his teeth on me. Not as permanent as the tattoo of him on my heart. I’m ruined. I know that now.
His cock throbs inside me with each torturous thrust. My hips ache from the angle and my mouth is dry, tongue thick in my mouth.
“No,” I say one more time, tears gathering in my eyes.
Benji slows his pace, his arm coming around to tug me up until we're both kneeling on the bed. His hot palm comes up to cup the side of my face, turning my head until he can stare unflinchingly into my eyes. He’s the bravest man on earth.
“Can I do it my way now?” Benji asks quietly, tears in his eyes.
I nod slowly, unable to form words.
I’m lightning and Benji is the thunder, the protective boom that follows my bright flash of light. If only I could hold on to him, maybe the storm wouldn’t be so terrifying when I get lost to the darkness. But it’s not fair to Benji to use his thunder. Not fair at all.
Benji takes my mouth in a gentle kiss as he switches from aggressor, from brutal taker, to life giver. He tastes so familiar, so startlingly real when everything else around me is unrepentantly fake. He lets go of my face to squeeze his fingers around my wrist, pressing his thumb where my pulse pounds.Benji presses my hand to my abdomen and I gasp at the feel of him moving inside me.
“That’s me, inside you, feel it?”
“Benji.”
“Do you feel it?” Benji repeats, each word enunciated with a hard thrust.
“Yes,” I admit. But the word is double-edged. I feel his cock in me, moving deep inside me, owning me in ways no one else ever has, but I also feel him in my chest when my ribs move with each breath. I feel him inside me in every single way that matters.
“Nolan,” Benji whispers against my neck just as he rolls his hips.
“I feel you everywhere,” I mumble as he takes me apart.
His lips glide over my neck, like butterflies on my skin. Benji sighs in relief and then tips us over to lie on our sides. Grabbing my thigh, he tugs my leg up so that he can get a deeper angle. I gasp and grab his forearm when he slides so deep I can feel him in my throat.
“Jesus, Benji, I…”
“Just feel it, angel.”
And then he takes me apart and puts me back together. Every time he pulls out, he drags his cock along my stretched rim, only to slowly slide back in so deep that stars explode in my vision. All I feel is Benji. All I hear is the sound of his breaths against the shell of my ear. He tangles our fingers together and brings them to my chest, just over my heart.
He fucks me for what feels like hours. I’m delirious and begging for something that I can’t put words into. Onlypleaseandnowandneed youfall from my lips. But Benji doesn’t go anywhere, doesn’t leave me alone in my want. He meets me right in the middle, beat for fucking beat.
“I’ve never fucked someone raw before,” Benji whispers, cheek pressed against my own. “It feels like you were pluckedfrom heaven and brought down here for me. A perfect fit. When I come inside you, a part of me will stay there forever. I’m giving a piece of myself to you.”
I want to bite him, I want to slap him, I want to fight against the overwhelming tide of emotions, but instead I pull his arm tighter around me and squeeze my eyes shut to blot out everything else buthim. Only him. Only ever Benji. My thunder.
He licks his other palm and takes my cock in a tight grip. I hadn’t even realized I was hard, my orgasm a distant thing in the back of my terrified brain. He curls his hand around the base, squeezes tight, then slowly brings his palm up to cup the head of my cock. Every thrust inside perfectly hits my prostate, so much so that my toes tingle, and the air gets caught in my rib cage.
“I need you to come first so I can watch you fall apart on my cock. Can you do that, angel? Can you come for me?”
The words trigger some hidden part of me that I’ve never known. My orgasm flows through me like the waves of a violent black ocean. Distantly, I’m aware that Benji orgasms too, his release hot, and so very real inside of me. For this solitary moment in time, I’m alive. Benji pulls out and I feel so fucking alone without him inside me. But because Benji can read me line by fucking line, he rolls me over and slips two fingers inside me.
