Jackson walks over to the side of the bike, dipping down to tug a bag of apples out of the compartment. A beaming grin covers his face as he eagerly leads me towards the weathered fence. The horses wearily wander over toward us, curiosity leading them to investigate the new outsiders.
Jackson makes a clicking noise with his mouth as the horses get closer. One’s dark chestnut brown, and the other is white with brown spots. Their heads shake, and their manes whipin the wind on their approach. Slowly, Jackson lifts his hand to reveal the shiny red apple. The braver horse, the chestnut-colored one, sniffs at Jackson’s hand before promptly taking the apple in his mouth. Juice flies all over, dripping down the horse’s teeth.
Haphazardly dangling over the edge of the fence, I prompt the other horse to step closer with a wiggle of my fingers. Reaching my hand out slowly, I carefully touch the white horse's muzzle, focusing on the ridge of its nose. The softest skin on earth, even as the horse trembles and shakes underneath me.
Jackson gently nudges my side. “Want to feed them?”
I nod excitedly, lips aching from smiling. He gently places an apple in my unoccupied hand. Holding it out to the horse, a giggle erupts from me when it quickly eats it up, lips grazing over my hand. Just like the other horse, juice makes a mess of the horse’s lips. I let my head fall against the horse’s, feeling all sorts of small beside the large, gentle creature. A little whine escapes the horse, but otherwise, it doesn’t seem to mind my petting it. They must be someone's prized possession. I know they’d be mine.
We feed the horses a few more apples, then watch as they amble away, no longer interested in us due to lack of food. I stay standing on the fence, hands carefully gripping the weathered wood to keep from falling. Only when I look down do I realize that Jackson was carefully situated behind me, hands on either side, in case I fell.
He helps me down with a firm grip on my hips. I stumble a little when hitting the ground, but he steadies me.
I brush a hand over his shoulder, letting it rest gently against the warm nape of his neck. “Thank you.”
Jackson dips down to kiss me, just a soft brush of lips. “You’re welcome. You have a way with animals.”
“I’m feral like them. We understand one another.”
“Feral, huh?” Jackson teases, one eyebrow raised.
I bite my lip and nod. “Wild and free.”
Jackson lightly brushes the pads of his fingers down my face, finally hooking his fingers under my chin. His gaze is fathomless, swallowing me whole in the depths of his eyes. I think I could stare at him forever, smell the sweet scent of his skin. Everything about Jackson is beautiful, almost painfully so. It’s going to hurt so bad when he moves on.
“Let’s sit for a minute.” Jackson scopes out the side of the road before settling on a small patch of wildflowers close to the fence. After checking for bugs or snakes or God knows what, he pats the ground beside him as he folds his legs underneath himself.
I collapse beside him in a gangly pile of limbs. Usually, I’d feel self-conscious, but his heavy gaze makes me feel anything but. Plus, he’s already seen me naked, so obviously, he at least likes what I’ve got going on.
The breeze is cool when it whips over us, sending the tall grass over the fence swaying. I tug my knees up to loop my arms around my legs, resting my cheek against my jean-clad knees. Jackson plays idly with a piece of grass between his long fingers. A seemingly nervous habit.
After a while, his gaze lifts back to mine.
“I used to be an escort,” Jackson announces, apropos of nothing.
“Oh,” I say like an idiot, absolutely not knowing how to reply.
Jackson shakes his head softly. “I really like you, and I want to see where this goes. But it didn’t feel right to go into this without being upfront. I quit when I moved here, mostly because, well, I’m kind of tired of it.”
“Why’d you do it at all?”
Jackson sighs heavily, flicking the blade of grass to the ground. “I told you about my knee and the NBA. I’d alwayshad this dream of paying off my parents’ home for them, letting them retire early. I had a friend in college who did escorting on the side, and I just kind of fell into it. It helped me stay sane, although I didn’t really need the money. I do just fine with my stocks.”
“So you’ve been with a lot of people, then?” I ask, unable to help myself. Jealousy curdles in my stomach, awful and angry.
“I’ve been with a lot of people, yes.” Jackson reaches over to splay his hand across my thigh. The touch is comforting, although I don’t want it to be. “But I don’t think about them when I’m trying to fall asleep at night. Okay?”
I flush and look away from him, but I don’t lash out. Progress. Instead, I keep my gaze focused on the hills behind us and gently tangle my fingers with his against my thigh.
“If you’ve been with so many people, why on earth would you want to be with me?”
Jackson’s fingers squeeze mine. I keep my gaze averted, not wanting to see the expression on his face. Not yet, at least.
“You’re a spitfire, Harper. You hiss, spit, and claw at every sweet advance I make on you. There’s probably something wrong with me, but I find more joy in you than I’ve found in anyone in the past few years. Trust me when I tell you that, please.”
When I turn back to look at him, his eyes are soft, expression painfully sincere. What a fucking speech. Unable to form a word myself, I opt to tell him just what I think without uttering a sound. I hurriedly crawl into his lap and slam my mouth against his own. His hand finds a home in my hair, as he loves to do. The kiss is soft, perfectly sweet, and I wonder again what the time limit for this whole shebang is going to be. But in the meantime, I’ll take his kisses, and I’ll take his attention, storing it away for a cloudy, lonely day. Today was the date of my dreams, so surely there’s no way any of this could last.
His thumb sweeps over my scar and his eyes ask a million questions. “Will you tell me?” Jackson asks softly.
