“Beau, Beau, Beau,” I chant as pleasure radiates through my entire body.
His fingers dig into my hips, holding me down so I can’t thrust up into his welcoming mouth. Pulling off abruptly, he sucks at the head of my cock again, before licking down my shaft to lavish kisses at the base. Fuck. He’s worshiping me, this is what it’s like to be wanted, to be needed. Just the thought alone shatters me into a million pieces of desire. His dark eyes stare at me, taking me apart, while simultaneously putting me back together. My chest heaves with my stuttered breaths.
“Give it to me,” Beau orders, fingers a loose grip around my cock wet with his spit. “I want you to let go. Let go, Trevor. Please. You’re safe.”
He swallows me back down, his throat moving around me, a moan falling from his lips as if just the taste of me turns him on. Stars immediately explode behind my eyes. The stars in the sky, and supernovas behind my eyelids from the exquisite, perfect pleasure of being in Beau’s mouth. Sucking me to the back of his throat, he holds me there, swallowing around me again. Thighstrembling, stars filling my vision, I come down his throat with a pained shout of ecstasy. In a daze, body floating, I blink up at the glittering sky.
Beau licks my cock clean, then slides up my body to kiss me, sharing the taste of myself on his tongue. Wrapping my arms around him, I tug him down tighter against me, until the warmth of his skin bleeds into my own. His fingers tangle in my hair, holding me close, like I’m fine china, like he’s afraid to break me. But he never could. Beau could never do anything but give me joy, peace, and comfort.
“I want to taste you,” I say against his mouth, breathless.
Beau chuckles, pushing the hair from my face. “Another day. Tonight was about you.”
“Beau,” I growl.
Beau just chuckles, totally unfazed by me. Maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe I need to get used to being taken care of without owing anything back. Beau takes his shirt off, then tucks me against his body, pulling a blanket over us to keep us warm against the damp and slightly chilly air. I love the smell of his skin, even his sweat, it's sweet and earthy and comforting.
“Do you think there’s life after death?” Beau asks quietly, sadness coloring his words.
“Like the Cher song?”
Beau chuckles. “I think you’ve got the names mixed up, but I like your intention.”
I stare up at the sky, head tucked against the crook of his arm, my hand curled against his strong stomach. I rub my thumb in a circle over his skin, needing to touch him, but knowing he needs my touch too.
“I like to think there’s something out there.”
Beau squeezes my arm gently. “Sometimes it’s nice to imagine.”
“Do you think your dad’s waiting for you?”
Beau hums in agreement. “He’s workin’ on a car, waiting for me to come home.”
“What kind of car?”
Beau’s fingers press hard against my spine bringing me even closer. I don’t think he’s going to answer me for a while. Just the sound of the heat bugs, and the gentle flow of the river filter around us. Staring up at the black night sky, the blinking stars sing a quiet song of stillness. Of hope, that I spent so long not allowing myself.
“He’s working on an old truck, for you and me. One that we can drive into the sunset. His gift to us. Sounds nice, right?”
“Yeah, Beau. It sounds perfect.”
Closing my eyes with a bittersweet smile, I settle more firmly against Beau. Sleep comes for me, soft and gentle. Sounds of Beau’s fingers carding through my hair, wind through the trees, and the river lull me into one of the most peaceful sleeps of my entire life.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
BEAU
Romancing Trevor is easy. Every time I make him smile, make him blush, I know this is where he belongs. With me. But sometimes that reservation lingers, like when we were still playing pretend. As if maybe he thinks he’s not worth every ounce of my love.
I can only pray that time will help me solve that particular problem. He settles into my house like he’s always been there. Maybe there’s always been a Trevor-shaped hole in my life.
We spend my next day off wandering aimlessly around town. I show Trevor my preferred Publix, buy him some foods that he likes to keep in the house. We grab Pub Subs and eat them on the tailgate of my truck with our legs dangling over the edge. The smile he aims at me over such a simple activity is enough to send my heart into overdrive. I want to make him smile like that for the rest of my life. Even after.
This whole taking-it-slow thing is my decision, and for a good reason. Sleeping at night with him in the other room is nearly a form of torture. Sometimes I hear him get up at night to use the bathroom, his feet softly padding down the hall. Might be my imagination, but sometimes I think he pauses outside my room.I almost wish he’d just stroll right in, climb into my bed, and collapse into my waiting arms.
But he doesn’t.
Because Trevor respects my wish, endearing him to me even further.
