“What’s wrong?”
Eli shakes his head wildly in my grasp. “Nothing. I have allergies.”
“Eli,” I say, reprimanding him for the obvious lie.
“Colby, don’t.” Eli sniffs once, then places a sweet, chaste kiss against my palm. “Make me feel special today. Give me the husband experience. Can you do that for me?”
That I can easily do. I kiss him softly until the tension leaves his body and he sways against me. He leans against me, like he was made for me, like my body was made to protect him.
We get dressed in comfortable clothes due to the oppressive heat we’ll undoubtedly encounter outside. Florida is predictable in the summer.
Eli looks like a showstopper just in frayed denim shorts, a T-shirt for a band I have no idea about, and beat-up Converse. He looks so young, in a way that makes me feel wildly protective of him. His age reminds me that the gulf between us is so similar to the one between Marcus and me. But age doesn’t matter when souls recognize one another, right? It had worked out so well for me before. Even though the age gap had been reversed.
Eli climbs into the Jeep with a smile that shakes me to my core. God, I’m going to miss that fucking smile. We drive downthe coast to only the sound of the wind in our hair. After we pull through a drive-thru for coffee, Eli puts his hand on my knee, almost out of habit. I swallow against the rising tide of emotions inside of me.
I take him to a local sprawling garden so that we can walk around with our coffees. Eli tangles his fingers with mine and swings our hands back and forth between us.
“It’s not too hot out this morning,” Eli comments while taking a slow sip of his iced coffee.
“Probably the rain from yesterday.”
Eli hums thoughtfully. “Probably true.”
“Where did you grow up?” I ask because I need to know more about him.
Eli turns to me, eyebrows knitted. “Why? You’re my husband, you know already.”
“Eli.”
He laughs, that deep, beautiful laugh that I want to bottle up. “We moved around a lot actually. I’ve lived mostly everywhere. But I live in the South now.”
“Where?” I demand, tugging on his hand so that he has to face me. “Tell me where you live now, Eli.”
“Don’t do this,” Eli whispers. His eyes implore me to stop. “Colby, be good to me today.”
I swallow against the feeling of him slipping away from me. Eli falls into my arms easily when I tug him to me, wrapping an arm around his waist, one around his shoulders, I hold him close to me. I kiss his wild curls and breathe him in deep.
“Sorry,” I say into his hair.
“Forgiven,” Eli mumbles into my chest.
His fingers curl against my side just once. He pushes me away and grins brightly up at me. “Where is the butterfly garden?”
I tenderly push some curls from his face, letting my fingers linger at the edge of his forehead, then trail them down to press my thumb against the dip of his lips.
“I’ll show you,” I tell him.
Eli quirks his head, smiles, but doesn’t reply. I take his hand back in my own and tug him towards the butterfly garden. The butterflies are so active today, flying all over the place. Must be the humidity. It’s an open garden, full of bright, blooming flowers. Sweat breaks out across Eli’s back, dampening his shirt. I watch as he strolls through the garden with a large grin on his face. That awed look crosses his face as he sweeps his fingertips across the blooming flowers, lingering on some bright blue hydrangeas.
A butterfly lands on his outstretched hand. He gasps in happiness, then turns to look at me, nodding towards his hand so I see the butterfly.
“I see, baby,” I say, voice strained even to my own ears.
Eli doesn’t notice that I’m about to break down. I pull out my phone to snap photos of the moment, wanting to capture it forever. The picture can’t capture the purity of the moment though. Not by a long shot. The butterfly lifts off and flies away. Eli watches it until it disappears from his sight. I can’t help but feel like Eli is that butterfly for me. Giving me a few moments of awed bliss, before flying away to better skies.
This hurts more than I ever thought it could.
We spend the rest of the early morning walking through the gardens. After we’re done there, we hop back into the Jeep, and head towards the local pier. It’s a tourist trap, but it’s fun too. I want to show Eli the best that there is to offer here. I try not to think about why.
