“Why? Did Mr. Rockstar need to put in his custom order before anyone else?” Sabs’s voice drips with sarcasm. “After Bouncing Bunna was stormed by his fan club yesterday morning, maybe he wanted to get in ahead of the crowd.”
“He wasn’t there for drinks,” I murmur. “Tae is… part of Jagger’s pack.”
Sabs’s jaw drops. It’s rare to see her lost for words, but right now, she’s totally speechless, fish-mouthing and looking at me like my head has suddenly morphed into a giant colander.
“But Jagger Knight doesn’t have a pack.” Kady takes her cell phone out of her pocket then starts madly scrolling. “There were rumors about him forming a pack with his bandmates, Drew and Brad, but nothing has ever been confirmed. And there’s never been mention of him being in a pack with anyone else. If there were, it would’ve been all over the news.”
“Maybe they want to keep it a secret?” I shrug. “Honestly, I have no idea. After Jagger interrupted us, I left before asking any more questions. But both of them admitted it, so it must be true.”
“I d-don’t get it,” Sabs finally finds her voice again. “Why would a rockstar form a pack with a barista?”
“Sabs!” Kady tsks. “Occupation isn’t everything!”
“That’s not what I meant.” Sabs rolls her eyes. “You know I don’t care about bullshit like that, but it makes me wonderhow they even met in the first place. From what I see online, Jagger is always attending flashy celebrity parties. What’s he doing hanging around with someone like Tae? He sounded so… normal.”
A timer beeps behind me, making me jump up. “The cupcakes!”
I race to the oven to peer inside. Fuck, the sponge has sunk in the middle. I must have set the oven to the wrong temperature in my rush to get them in.
“They’re ruined.” I open the oven, met with a wall of heat, heart sinking in defeat—just like the droopy cupcakes. “All of them.”
“Let me deal with these.” Sabs grabs another pair of oven mitts then carefully removes them from the oven. “They still smell delicious, even if they’re a little flat. You know, maybe they’ll even taste better this way”
I smile at her through water-filled eyes. “Maybe.”
“Why don’t you sit down and eat?” Kady grabs a cooling blondie. It’s still gooey and warm in the middle, raspberry juices oozing out as she plops it onto a plate. “Food makes everything feel better, right? You taught me that. Though I don’t usually condone this level of sugar for breakfast, I’ll make an exception.” Before I can take a bite, Kady turns her phone around to show me. “And Pisces says that you have to be kind to yourself today.”
“You don’t even read horoscopes,” I say to her as I shovel in a bite, feeling better about my choice of breakfast and grateful I didn’t burn or use the wrong ingredients in this one.
“See?” Sabs chirps. “Much better already.”
“A little,” I admit.
“Have you heard from Tae since?” Kady asks.
“He sent a few texts.” I cast a glance at my phone, balanced on the countertop, sprinkled in flour. “But I haven’t read them.”
“Do you want me to look at them?” Kady offers.
I nod, feeling pathetic for not being able to face looking at them alone.
She retrieves my phone then flicks through my messages while I wait with bated breath. “He says he’s sorry about how the date ended…” she hums. “He wants to see you again… had a great time… thinks you should all talk.”
I take a deep breath, mustering my composure. “Delete them.” My voice comes out sounding much stronger than I feel.
Her fingers hover over the keys. “Are you sure?”
“And block his number too.”
Kady looks up at me. “Really?”
“Look, it doesn’t matter how nice Tae is.” Or how cute his penis adornments and latte art are. “He’s Jagger’s packmate. I’m finally in a better place after what happened with Jagger last year. I can’t go back. It’s already bad enough that I have to hear about him from everyone on campus.” I pick at the blondie, sprinkling crumbs across the plate as I tear it into tiny pieces. “How can I date Tae without seeing Jagger? It would be impossible.”
“Okay.” Kady presses a button on my phone. “Done.”
I thought I’d feel relief. Instead, a fresh wave of numb heaviness sweeps through me. I know the feeling well. For the first few months after Jagger left, I struggled through the agonizing heartbreak until my body couldn’t take any more suffering. My grief turned to numbness as my way of coping. I thought I had finally gotten used to living with the hollow emptiness in my chest, but seeing Jagger again made all the emotions come flooding back. Despite how much he hurt me, I couldn’t help feeling drawn to him.
“I’m so proud of you, Del,” Sabs drops a kiss on the top of my head. “You don’t need any of those jerks in your life.”
