“Move, get your bitch ass out of my face!” I pushed him away then climbed out of the truck. “I aint riding nowhere with your dog ass.” I spat as I attempted to walk away.
Jahrein snatched me by my ponytail. “Get your ass in the truck.” he fumed.
I started clawing his face. “Bitch, let me go.”
Tony and Tameka walked over with the rest of my kids. I guess out of embarrassment, Jahrein released my hair. It reminded me so much of the scene that my children had just displayed minutes before that. Was that the environment and example that we’d set for them?
“Why you fighting mommy, Daddy?” Jhyrah asked.
“Daddy was just playing, mama.” Jahrein lied to her. “Come on y’all, get in the truck.”
Jahrein Junior, Jhyrah, and Jahrae all climbed in the truck.
He turned to me. “Get in.”
“No.” I clenched my teeth.
He nodded and turned towards the kids. “Y’all, mommy about to leave us.” he told them.
All the kids’ eyes bucked. “No, mommy. Come on.” Jahrein Junior cried.
“Why would you tell them that?” I asked his stupid ass.
“Because, aint that what you trying to do?” he asked me with a raised brow.
“You’s a dumb muthafucka.” I spat as I hopped back in the truck. Once again he was trying to make me look the like the bad guy, while he remained their hero.
“That’s alright.” he replied as he closed the door for me. “I see you aint going nowhere.”
It was becoming painfully clear that he was becoming far too comfortable.By the time we made it home I was furious. I kept imagining myself leaving Jahrein, so that he could drown himself in his own tears. I wanted to do something. I didn’t like that he was in a place where he was so comfortable. He thought that every wrong could be righted with one kissor a new gift. A couple of years ago, that was truly all I needed to cope but people change. I wanted more. Hell, I deserved more.
Jahrein was still looking at me as that same thirteen year old Raven that gazed at him with goggle eyes, and did everything that he said. I don’t think he realized that he was dealing with a woman. I was a young woman, but nonetheless a woman. And this whole ghetto fabulous life that we were living was taking a toll on me. I wanted Jahrein to know that the money, the cars, or houses wasn’t the reason that I stuck with him. I loved him unconditionally, but there were only so many times that he could hurt me. Eventually, he was going to turn my heart to stone.
“Raven, where is the remote?” Jahrein asked me as I fixed Jahreiah’s bottle in the kitchen. I shrugged my shoulders and kept my back to him.
I hated how he'd spark up meaningless conversations to distract me.
After a few seconds of silence, I realized that he was still standing there, staring at me. I guess that he wanted me to acknowledge him, but I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction.
“So, that’s what you’re going to do all day, huh?” he asked. I didn’t answer. “All that pouting you’re doing aint even called for.” He complained, as I moved around in the kitchen as if he wasn’t there. I busied myself with fixing bottles for later and cooking dinner.
“Raven.” He sighed.
I said nothing, as I poured myself a glass of apple juice.
“I know you hear me talking to you!” he shouted, losing his cool.
“Is all that necessary?” I asked him sarcastically.
“Can you look at me?”
I released an exasperated sigh, and lifted my head. “What?” I asked, as I finally gave him eye contact.
“Why are we still going through this?”
“Through what?”
“Every time one of these bitches does something or says something you take it out on me.”
