He loves me.
He said my love makes him want to save me.
His love makes it possible for me to leave this room.
53
LEV
My sister shuts the door, cutting me off from Serafina. My heart knows it. My lungs know it. Every aspect of my being knows it.
I hate it.
Thirty seconds have passed since last seeing her—if that—and already, I’m dying inside.
Anastasia hooks her arm into mine and leads me away from the door, even though there’s nowhere I’d rather be. Zeno is striding up the aisle, his face thunderous as he escapes the insane number of people Vitale insisted on inviting, so I’m grateful for her timing.
“How are you?” she murmurs, scanning the packed church.
The buzz of conversation, minor by other people’s standards but horrendous by mine, inflames this thing. If there’s something worse than the hell about to go down, that is. My skin itches, and this suit is too tight.Everythingis wrong.
Since waking this morning, my head has been in a permanent state of fuzziness, and it’s gotten worse since arriving at the church, being forced away from Serafina while she was prepped by Anastasia, Vanessa, and the staff Vitale hired.
“There are very few people I’d do this for.”
Zeno approaches. “She ready?”
“As much as she can be.”
He glances towards the shut door and huffs, his tanned skin flushing paler than normal. “I always hoped I’d be walking her down the aisle one day, but not like this.”
He continues for the door, and Anastasia leads me down the aisle. Every step is a painful reminder of what I’m about to witness, and I count them, gaining an idea of how many Serafina will be taking, giving me a countdown to work with. With an idea of how long her trip will take, there’s a defined ending.
People glance up as we pass, some outwardly muttering. It’s well known the Bratva’s Pakhan and her Elite are in attendance, something a few of the Capos take issue with, according to Zeno. They believe this should be closed to Cosa Nostra only.
We make it to the second pew on the left—the bride’s side—where Dimitri and Katya are already seated, having decided to come despite their own recent hell when Dimitri was held prisoner in Toronto by Ivan’s followers. Katya smiles shyly while Dimitri nods, telling me he gets it.
He doesn’t, but I suppose it’s nice to have someone try.
Vanessa and Nero are in the first row. Nero shoots me a grim look in greeting before linking his hands in front of him. His shoulders are tense, his glare returning to the front of the church. Vanessa is doing the same.
It’s the front I direct my anger towards, towards the man who stands there, scanning the audience, his grin victorious. His scan comes to a stop on Vanessa, where his eyes narrow slightly, and then on me. His mouth pulls up on one side and throws a final wink before facing the approaching minister.
Then, the world stops turning when the traditional wedding march plays through the church. Guests stand, angling themselves to the duo appearing in the back.
A bride, who, by traditional standards, should be blushing and happy but is instead shut off. Not pissed, unhappy, or cheery—just blank. Her grip is tight around the white rose bouquet, her bright eyes glazed as she glowers. A quick check of her trajectory reveals she’s staring at the statue of God behind Alessio’s head.
Acting as a father might, Zeno’s arm is linked into hers, keeping her close. His eyes sweep the room, his jaw tense.
The march goes quickly. Soon, they’re midway down the aisle, and my mental step count is fast approaching its end. Then, they’re two-thirds. It’s only been a minute, sixty seconds—too fast. Ten more seconds, and she’ll be withhim.
As she approaches, her eyes flick to me. Her expression gives nothing away, but the slight rise in her shoulders tells me she’s inhaled. Motion draws my attention to the bouquet, where her index finger taps once, twice, and then once again, my habitual response to anxiety.
She can have it. She’s stolen the rest of me—heart included—so why not my tapping pattern?
My finger taps the same on my knee.
She looks away as she passes, dragging her gaze to Vanessa and Nero and then to the front again as Zeno comes to a stop. With obvious tenseness, he sets her hand in Vitale’s and backs away. No one could miss Zeno’s glare before he strides off the podium to Vanessa’s side.
