Gray was on his back under the fire engine when he recognized her footsteps on the concrete.He recognized a lot of things about Bonnie Watson that he probably shouldn't be noticing quite so closely.She wasn’t technically his boss, but they were going to be working together closely in the days to come.
Plus, he was a big believer in letting a woman signal first that she was interested in him before he started pursuing her.Particularly a woman like Bonnie who had suffered an incalculable loss and might not even be interested in dating, let alone diving into a romantic relationship.
Whoa.Did he just think the phrase ‘romantic relationship’ in the same thought as Bonnie?
Yes, Einstein.You did.
The next obvious question was what he planned to do about it.For the moment, nothing.Bonnie might blush about every time they made meaningful eye contact, but she hadn’t given him any overt signal that she was interested in more than just a cordial professional relationship.
He rolled out from under the vehicle.She was standing beside the big red engine.Her defensive posture faded as she looked around, replaced with an expression he hadn't seen from her before.It wasn’t the stricken composure of her first visit.Rather, she looked amazed.
“You've been busy,” she said in wonder.
He climbed to his feet and reached for a rag.The bay was spotless, the floor swept, mopped, and buffed.The engine and ambulance were freshly washed and waxed, the equipment lockers sorted, inventoried, and newly labeled.He’d even scrubbed the walls and repainted them a bright, clean white.He'd spent two solid days on that.
“There’s still a lot to do,” he replied.“I see projects everywhere I look.”
“Gray.”She turned slowly, taking it in.“This place looks better than it did when it was running and fully staffed.”
He wasn't sure what to say to that, so he said nothing.
She turned back to him.“You didn't have to do all of this before the inspections.The inspector will grade on the building’s structural condition, not ...”She gestured at the gleaming floor.“This.”
“I know.”He folded the rag.“But I couldn’t leave it the way it was.”It had looked so ...sad.Weighed down by time and grief.How was he supposed to ask new firefighters to come work in a place that looked and smelled like death?
She nodded in mute gratitude.In the late afternoon light slanting into the garage, her eyes were more gold than green or brown.Her blonde hair glittered in soft waves around her shoulders and even her skin had taken on a golden glow in the magical Montana light.She looked like a fey creature, too beautiful and ethereal for this world.
Then the fey being held out a red folder to him and said dryly, “More forms.”
He frowned as he took it from her.“I thought we agreed you weren’t going to bring these to me.I meant what I said at lunch.I’ll come to the office.I know it’s painful for you to be here, and there’s no need for you to be reminded of the past.”
She said soberly, “When am I not reminded of the past?I live with it every minute of every day.“
“I’m so sorry, Bonnie.”
“Thank you,” she said simply.She lifted her gaze to his, and for a long, naked moment, let him see her pain laid bare.It rocked him to his core.He’d never considered before he came to Cobbler Cove and met the eight widows from the Shoemacher fire how completely and utterly a life could be destroyed by a single tragic moment.
He’d been five when his dad left his wife and three boys and never returned.Gray only vaguely remembered the screaming matches between his parents, his mom crying in bed alone when his dad stayed out all night drinking, the quiet panic of his older brothers as they’d been helpless to keep their father from slipping away from the family.
He’d grown up with the aftermath of his father’s mental illness, that Gray now knew to be PTSD from being a military medic in a war zone.But even his parents’ messy divorce didn’t come close to approaching the scale of what Bonnie and her kids had gone through.
Bonnie said firmly, “The City of Cobbler Cove’s most important services to the community are the police department, emergency medical services, and soon, the fire department.You’re about to be in charge of two of those.And I am, for all intents and purposes, the city.I’m going to be involved with this place alot, and I need to get used to being here again.So I might as well start.”
“You don't have to do it now.You’ve got time before this place opens.”
She retorted, “Better now when there’s just you to witness my breakdowns and freak outs.”
Her gaze snapped up to his as if she’d just realized she trusted him enough to break down and freak out in front of him.His eyes widened as well as it dawned on him what she’d just admitted by accident.
She trusted him.
They gazed candidly at each other for a moment.He promised silently that he wouldn’t abuse the trust she’d placed in him, and that he was here for her.
...and on cue, her cheeks turned bright pink.
“You're not wrong that it did upset me to be here the first time,” she said, honestly.“But I need to be able to come here without falling apart.Iwantto be able to come here and be okay.”She looked around the bay again, stubbornness settling in her expression.
He understood the logic.He also understood it was costing her a lot to do this, and he respected that she wasn't asking for sympathy or acknowledgment of how hard it was.
