The gate bursts open and Spencer rides down an eight-second ride, and all the while I snap his moves on the back of Dynamite.
After the riders are done, I pack up my equipment and head for Levi’s office. Managing to navigate the rabbit warren of back rooms, I find him outside the infirmary, talking with Willow.
My footsteps echo down the corridor, and Willow leans around Levi and offers up a smile. “Hey, Maggie. He’s not here.”
“Oh no, I wasn’t?—”
Levi turns and meets my gaze. “I can drive you over if you want.”
“Wh-where is he?”
“Falkland General,” Willow adds. “Possible fractured leg.”
My skin is all of a sudden too tight. Heat prickles up my skin. I swallow and choke on the movement.
“Hey, he’ll be fine.” Levi’s brows drop as he reaches for me.
“I can’t do this.” I fly back down the corridor a heartbeat later.
“Maggie!” Levi calls after me, but the sound echoes around my head as I bust through the door and out into the night air.
People startle, conversations stopping, as they turn to see who just snapped the door almost off its hinges.
“Sorry,” I breathe, keeping my head down as I stalk my way to my van. By the time I make it there, tears are coursing down my cheeks, hot, wet, and falling freely. I rip the van door open and climb inside. Slamming the door shut behind me, I curl up in the corner.
Head in my hands, I force steady, slow breaths in my nose and out my mouth. A skill Cap once taught me.
That crumples my face like nothing else.
Ugly sobs rack through my body when I don’t manage to rein in the emotion. As if every horrible moment I’ve lived through all just collided, I rock on my seat, crying. Desperate to rid my body of the trauma, the pain, and the fear of what happened, whatcouldhappen, and ending up like my mom.
“I promised I wouldn’t do this. I fucking well promised,” I choke out.Dammit.
I am barely falling for this man, and I’m a wreck the first time he gets hurt.
I don’t know how to compartmentalize this. I don’t know how to hand over my heart in my palm to some two-ton devil every week and hope it doesn’t get crushed.
I’m obviously not as brave as my mother, because she lived this life with my father for years before...
A fresh torrent of sobs and tears overwhelm me.
My heart is tearing in two, and we haven’t even given over the deepest part of ourselves yet.
Or maybe we have already.
A soft knock rattles the van’s sliding door.
“Maggie, you in there?”
Brady.
I suck in a breath, swiping at my wet face in an effort to dry it a little.
“Maggie, Hadley wants to know if you’re okay.” He shuffles on his feet. “You’re okay?”
Oh god.
He’s the one in the hospital, and I’m what he’s worried about. He’s lying in a hospital bed and all I can think about is my stupid self. The damage I’ll take if this goes wrong. When this ends...
