Ellie,
I’m not very good with words. I’ll probably never be able to express fully the way I feel, but I’ve wanted to tell you something I’ve never told anyone before. Not even Jett. It’s not something I’m proud of and not something I talk about. Ever. But when I was seventeen, I tried to commit suicide. It was the darkest time in my life. I was alone, homeless, and just wanted it all to end. I don’t mean to upset you by telling you this. It’s just ever since that day, a small part of me has always wished my attempt was successful. I’m sure you’re wondering why I picked today of all days to tell you this. It’s because, for the first time since that day, I woke up and was thankful to be alive. Thankful I failed because the happiness I feel outweighs every bad moment in my life. Every. Single. One. And it’s all because of you. You fill a piece of me I never knew existed, never thought I deserved. You’re the best part of all my sides, all my faces. You’re the glue. Thank you for being everything. My strength, my light, my hope, my warmth.
I love you always,
Kayne
By the time I finish reading the letter, I’m a blubbering mess and Jett is consoling me.
“What the hell was in that letter?”
I just shake my head and wipe my eyes. “The truth.” I smile.
“Are you okay?” Jett slides his hands up and down my arms and examines me closely.
“Yes. Fine, actually.”
He stares for a few seconds more. “Do I need to beat him up for making you cry?” He sounds like an overprotective older brother.
“No.” I laugh, glad my makeup isn’t done yet. “A black eye would look terrible in pictures.
“True. Why don’t you open your present?” he suggests.
“Yeah, good idea.” I sniff as I rip off the silver paper and pop open the small gift box. “Oh!” I gasp as a pair of diamond earrings stare back at me—ones that look exactly like my engagement ring. Two cushion-cut stones with a halo of pink diamonds around them.
“Perfect. Just like the girl who is going to wear them.” Jett smiles.
“You just always know what to say,” I quip.
“It’s a curse.” He sighs dramatically.
“I’m sure,” I respond drily as he kisses me firmly on the cheek.
“My work here is done.”
I grab his arm. “Not quite yet.”
I walk over to the closet and retrieve a large, white flat box and hand it over. “Make sure he opens it in private.”
Jett frowns. “Oh, no. Is it going to make him cry?”
I shrug playfully. “It might bring him to tears.”
I FIGHT WITH MY VEILas it blows around in the wind. My stomach is in knots and my heart is pounding in my ears. I have been hidden in a small alcove for the last twenty minutes as the guests arrive and take their seats. I’m so nervous, I’m bouncing in my barefoot sandals.
“You still have time to run, kid,” my father jokes.
“Kayne would find me.” I laugh nervously. It’s completely true. Besides, I may be nervous, but I know I could never live without him. Now more than ever.
I check myself one last time in the reflective wall of the ‘bride’s staging area.’ At least that’s what the wedding coordinator called it. My hair is falling in perfect waves around my face, my makeup is flawless, and my dress is hugging and pinching in all the right places. I went for something simple and romantic—a diamond white, backless A-line with double spaghetti straps and an empire waist. My favorite part—it has pockets.
“Time!” the wedding coordinator pokes her head in and announces just as the procession music starts to play.
Here goes everything.
Clutching my bouquet made of white roses and blue orchids, my father begins to lead me toward the aisle. We turn the corner to an expansive view of the Pacific Ocean, several small rows of chairs, and an arbor draped with white fabric, strings of crystals, and two small chandeliers. But as magnificent as the setup is, it’s only Kayne I see. Once our eyes lock, it’s like I gravitate toward him, float almost. He’s dressed in a white buttoned-down shirt and dress pants, the blue of his irises ablaze in the sunlight. His expression is composed, yet full of emotion all at the same time.
My father lifts my veil and kisses my cheek like we practiced at the rehearsal the night before and then gives me away. I take Kayne’s hand with a shaky breath as I step under the arbor with him. The smile that suddenly beams from his face nearly knocks me over, and I can’t help but laugh nervously, tears stinging my eyes.
