“Have a slice of toast first and some tea,” his mother suggested. “Every task is more easily accomplished on a full stomach.”
“I’ll ask the maid who managed the cooking while Eloise was away to start on it right away,” Athena said. “It won’t be as good, but at least we won’t go hungry.”
William sighed. Instinct told him to race off immediately in search of the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. But his mother was right, and if Athena was correct in her estimation, Eloise would try to find a place to stay first, which meant she probably wouldn’t visit the first employment agency until later in the day.
Calmed by the fact that he was sure to find her somewhere nearby at some point today, he agreed to have some breakfast before heading out.
#
TWO WEEKS LATER, WILLIAMwanted to strangle Athena for giving him false hope. He also wanted to stab the next person who told him to calm down. Especially when they suggested all would be well.
Nothing was well.Hecertainly wasn’t and neither was his search for Eloise. The woman had vanished – disappeared – as if she’d never existed at all. Except she had. When he closed his eyes he could still taste her skin on his lips, could still smell her sweet fragrance like some sort of torturous memory imbedded in his brain. And not knowing where she was, if she was healthy or ill, safe or in danger, able to make ends meet or struggling to get by, was putting him in a crazed state. Never in his life had he worried so much about another person or longed for someone so dreadfully much. It was like having his heart ripped from his chest and tossed into an empty void.
Pushing his horse into a faster gallop, he rode across the far side of Hyde Park with Charles and James close behind. His brothers had stepped in to help inquire after Eloise at the various employment agencies. When that idea had failed, they’d searched every tavern, inn, and potential boarding house London had to offer while also asking the men at their various clubs if their wives had recently hired a new French cook. The answer was never what William hoped for.
“Perhaps you should get away for a bit,” James suggested once they’d slowed their horses to a trot. “You look haggard.”
William sent him a scowl. “I’m not sleeping well.”
“Of course you’re not,” Charles said. “This search for Mrs. Lamont has taken over your life.”
“I hope you’re not suggesting I stop looking for her,” William growled.
“Of course not. But you must take care of your health and sanity. Allowing this to destroy you will be of no use to anyone, certainly not to Mrs. Lamont once you find her.”
William gave him a woeful smile. He appreciated the use of when as opposed to if. “Perhaps a brief reprieve wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world.”
“Abigail and I have been invited to attend a house party next Friday at Mr. and Mrs. Bertram’s estate,” James said. “It’s near Dartford, which isn’t so far, so you could return to London within a few hours whenever you please, and since it’s only for the weekend it won’t interfere with your work. I can ask if you might be allowed to join us.”
Spending time with a bunch of people who’d all be in a cheerful mood, wanting to play games and have fun, was frankly the last thing William was in the mood for. But much like the foul tasting cod-liver oil he’d been spoon fed as a child, it might be what he needed.
“Thank you,” he said while trying to sound at least somewhat enthusiastic. “I’d appreciate that.”
What he failed to predict was that the house party would turn out to be more hellish than he’d expected. Every guest, without exception – save him – belonged to a couple. He discovered this when he chose to go for a walk sometime after his arrival. Savoring the fresh air, he strolled past the lake while taking pleasure in the sound of ducks splashing about.
The setting was wonderfully romantic. He wished Eloise were there to enjoy it with him. The thought of her sliced right through him with startling swiftness, and he decided to try and locate some gentlemen with whom to enjoy a game of billiards. But when he returned to the house, he realized everyone else was paired off and that he was the only bachelor present.
Which only made Eloise’s absence all the more poignant. Christ, he missed her. He wished she was there to throw flour in his face, to upbraid him for stealing a bread roll, or simply to share her excitement over a mushroom.
He sighed as he lowered himself to a corner armchair in the parlor later that evening in order to await dinner. Coming here had seemed like a good idea last week, but he was certain now that it had been a mistake. Honestly, he ought to have gone to France instead and attempted finding her family. If she hadn’t returned there, then at least he’d know to keep looking in England.
The idea grew within him until he began tapping his foot. He was suddenly quite impatient to leave. First thing in the morning he’d pack his bags and depart. Portsmouth was less than a day’s travel from here. He could be in France the day after tomorrow and—
“What are you doing gathering dust over here by yourself?” James asked, interrupting William’s thoughts. He and Abigail had somehow materialized before him as if conjured out of thin air.
William stood and smoothed his jacket. He’d been so caught up in his own imaginings, he’d failed to realize the room had filled to capacity during the last few minutes. “Just contemplating my next move.”
James raised an eyebrow. “Nothing too drastic, I hope.”
“There are times when only drastic measures will do,” Abigail said with a wry smile. She glanced up at her husband. “You know that better than anyone.”
James cleared his throat. “Yes. Well. Extraordinary circumstances and all that.”
“Quite,” Abigail murmured.
The pair shared a secretive smile that made William’s heart fill with longing. Oh, how he hated being around people in love right now. Not that he begrudged them the deep emotion or wished them ill, he just wanted what they had for himself. He wanted Eloise, needed her with a desperation he feared might damage his health.
A gong sounded and a double door opened. The guests bustled forward, entered the dining room, and tried to locate their seats. William found his easily enough. He’d been placed between his sister-in-law and a baroness with whom he’d danced once years ago before she’d married.
