A distant warning bell echoed in her head, but she was too caught up in this new experience to heed it.
Especially since this was the man she’d dreamed of kissing since he’d walked into Clearview House with a hint of mischief in his eyes and a bit of a crooked smile. She’d liked him right from the start and had never felt that his scar detracted from his handsome features. If anything, she’d always thought it added an appealing element of danger to his overall appearance.
Beware.
Of what, she could not recall. What reason could there possibly be to end this glorious moment?
She inhaled through her nose, acknowledging a spicy scent of sandalwood, bergamot, and a hint of cloves. He smelled incredible. And now his arm was around her, his hand pressing into her back, and Emily could no longer think of anything at all. Except perhaps to consider the problem this business of kissing posed on breathing. That part of the whole experience was rather awkward and prevented her from enjoying the feel of him as much as she would have liked.
Perhaps if—
A squeal pierced the air, and before Emily could fully realize where the sound had come from, she heard a distinct voice say, “Oh, how wonderful! You are finally to be married!”
A breeze swept across Emily’s shoulders, and she opened her eyes as if from a dream. She saw Lord Griffin, but he wasn’t looking at her with the same kind of pleasure she’d felt in each cell of her body just seconds before. Instead he was staring to the side, his brow furrowed in a deep frown of pure irritation.
Emily turned and it was as if the world started to fold itself in on her, for there stood her mother, her sister, and her Aunt Julia, the Baroness of Hoff. All stared at her and Lord Griffin in a way that made Emily feel like she’d just walked into a cage and they’d locked the gate behind her. She glanced at Lord Griffin again and saw that he was about to speak, which prompted her to pull away from him quickly and walk toward the three women. Because the last thing she wanted was for him to confirm or deny anything. Doing so would either involve him sacrificing his future for her or breaking her heart.
“Lord Griffin has not proposed,” Emily said, “nor should he feel compelled to do so because of a mere kiss.” She glanced over her shoulder and saw that he was frowning more than before, if such a thing were possible.
“A mere kiss?” her mother squeaked while Laura and Aunt Julia raised their eyebrows into four pointy arches. “You were embracing and…” She waved her hands as if to form an image of what she had witnessed.
Emily tried to stay calm even though she knew the situation was spiraling out of control. It had in fact been doing so since Lord Griffin’s lips had touched hers. “I am not a debutante,” she began. “And besides, Lord Griffin was merely doing me the courtesy of sating my curiosity.”
The gentleman in question snorted from somewhere behind her right shoulder while Emily’s mother gasped as if this were more outrageous than the actual kiss itself. Which it might well have been.
But then her mother stepped forward to hiss in Emily’s ear. “You must accept his offer of marriage if he asks. What happened here could ruin your sister’s prospects.”
And there it was. The warning she had ignored in pursuit of her own selfishness.
“There is no need for anyone else to discover what transpired here.” Emily’s voice shook when she spoke to her aunt and her sister next. “Can I count on you to keep this incident to yourselves?”
Laura responded with an immediate nod, but Aunt Julia hesitated. “I am not sure that would be the best course,” she eventually said, causing panic to wrap its way firmly around Emily’s limbs. It tightened until she could scarcely breathe.
“Please.” God help her, she could feel tears starting to prick at her eyes. How could she have been so thoughtless? So foolish?
“Lord Griffin has compromised you, my dear,” Aunt Julia said without any hint of sympathy whatsoever. “Marrying him does seem like the best course of action.”
“I would be honored to offer for Miss Howard’s hand,” Lord Griffin said bleakly. Judging from his tone he might as well have been saying he’d fall on his own sword in order to save her.
And just like that, Emily’s heart shattered, destroying the illusion the kiss had somehow managed to create, of him wanting her just as much as she wanted him.
“If you do, I shall refuse,” she said, forcing the words past the knot in her throat. Somehow, she managed to stand still even though her legs shook beneath her silk gown. Before he could say anything further, Emily told her aunt plainly, “Keep this between us and I shall retreat to Clearview forever.”
Aunt Julia raised her chin a notch. She’d always been the one who disapproved most of Emily’s broken engagement, convinced that all blame lay on her shoulders. Since Emily’s return to London, she’d made it clear that she viewed her as a blemish on the family that would be better off tucked away in obscurity.
“Marrying a duke’s brother could perhaps restore your reputation,” Aunt Julia answered slowly.
Emily’s heart beat fast. “No. I will not wreck Lord Griffin’s life over this.” A smile tugged at Aunt Julia’s lips, and for the first time in her life, Emily imagined there might be a hint of respect in her eyes. It bolstered her courage and made her path clear. She turned to her mother. “I shall leave at once.”
Georgina’s eyes widened. “Emily, you cannot—”
But Emily no longer wanted to listen. She only wished to escape Society’s foolish rules and her own stupidity. Returning to London had been a mistake. She ought to have stayed away.
“Miss Howard. Please wait.”
Lord Griffin was on her heels, but Emily wouldn’t have it. Quickening her pace, Emily entered the ballroom and hastened through it. On her way, her gaze collided with Mr. Bale’s. He moved toward her as if intent on assisting her somehow. She shook her head, signaling for him to refrain as she hurried toward the foyer.
Mary entered the hallway from the music room, took one look at her, and frowned. “Are you all right?”
