The gravity with which he said it was like a stab to her chest. “I’m sorry,” she hastened to say, “I did not mean to offend or imply anything, I just...” She struggled to find the right words without making things worse. “You don’t look happy.”
His head turned slowly toward hers, catching her gaze in a riotous blend of emotion. “Happy?” The word sounded silly when he said it. “If only I had time for such frivolity, but the truth of it is that every time I catch a glimmer of it, life interferes and snuffs it out.” His jaw tightened, as did his voice. “Most days bring pain and suffering to my doorstep, my lady. My efforts to fight death are often futile, many of my patients poor and destitute. The things I have seen have led to despair and anger. It troubles me to see how easily the class to which I belong wastes its money on meaningless and ridiculous things when it could be put to much better use by helping those in need.”
It took Juliette a moment to process his cynical tone and the frank response he’d delivered. But rather than shy away from it as she might have done last year when she was still getting used to her new circumstances, she straightened her spine and prepared for battle.
“You have good reason to be frustrated, and yet I think you should count your blessings instead of complaining.” His expression hardened and he looked ready to disagree, but she didn’t give him the chance. “Whenever you want a reprieve, you can have it. My siblings and I did not have that kind of luxury. Every day was an ongoing struggle for survival. We starved, as did our friends, leaving my brother with no choice but to accept help from Carlton Guthrie.” Her voice quivered at the memory of what that had meant for Raphe. “That man owned him, Florian. He ruled his life, insisting he fight to pay back his debt, and still we barely had enough to make ends meet.
“When my youngest sister, Bethany, got sick, we couldn’t afford a physician or medicine. I watched her die, her body carried away on a cart to God knows where because we had no money to spend on a funeral.” She heaved a shuddering breath as the memories came flooding back. “Do you have any idea how often I wished to be whisked away from it all? To be someone else for simply one hour?”
“Lady Juliette, I—”
“This opulence you hate so much is a welcome escape from the hardships of life, Florian. It doesn’t mean the people here are ignorant or that they don’t care. It simply means they choose not to do so tonight, because life will be hard enough again tomorrow when this is all over.” Her annoyance with him had increased, pouring through her in waves and demanding she speak her mind. “You have an advantage, the rare opportunity to do more than most and to make an actual difference and yet you choose to cast a shadow over everyone else’s enjoyment with your brooding scowls and lack of enthusiasm.”
A nerve ticked at the edge of his jaw and Juliette finally ceased with her lecture. Blinking, she considered the manner in which she’d just cut him down to size and immediately thought of apologizing, but then she decided against it. He’d said he valued honesty rather than empty platitudes, so there he had it. She’d served it to him on a platter.
“Were you serious when you said you’d be interested in hearing about my work?”
Caught off guard by his question and how he’d apparently chosen to ignore everything she’d just said, she gave him an absent nod. “It’s certainly better than having to talk about who each debutante hopes to marry or which young lady might face potential ruin.”
He snorted in a way that hinted at a grin. “You don’t like gossip?”
“No,” she told him without even having to think. “I despise it.” When he arched a brow she said, “It’s usually malicious. Additionally, it’s hardly any business of mine what other people choose to do with their lives.”
Dropping his gaze, he ate another mouthful of soup, appearing to hide the beginnings of a smile behind the spoon. Encouraged, Juliette chuckled lightly to herself and ate some more soup as well. This conversation between them had probably been the most unpredictable one she’d ever had, and something about that thrilled her. She set her spoon aside and dabbed her mouth with her napkin while trying to think of a way to engage him further. It wouldn’t be easy since he was now discussing something with the man who was seated to his right.
Biding her time, Juliette decided to address the subject Florian had brought up twice already this evening. The moment she got her chance, she asked, “Did you see a lot of patients today before coming here?”
His glass faltered on its way to his mouth, the note of surprise widening his eyes as he darted a look in her direction, impossible to deny. He took a quick sip of his wine. “I um...” He cleared his throat and proceeded with greater certainty. “There were a few. One will require the removal of a kidney stone.”
“Really?” She tried to think of what might be involved. “So you will have to cut this person open and extract it?”
“No, no. Nothing that drastic.” He stared at her for a long hard moment before continuing. “There’s a way for me to do it without having to use a scalpel.”
Juliette pondered that comment and the vagueness of it while thinking back on some of the medical texts she’d managed to read in the past and the diagrams she’d seen of the human body. Realization suddenly hit. “Oh! You can go in through... there...” She felt her cheeks flush but refused to let it deter her. “And...” She couldn’t quite figure out the rest.
“There’s a special tool I use for crushing the stones,” Florian explained. “It allows the patient to eliminate smaller pieces on their own and without excessive amounts of pain. Especially with the recent discovery of morphine.”
“Morphine?”
He nodded. “It’s not officially on the market yet, but when a German colleague of mine informed me of his development of it a couple of years ago, I knew I had to try it. The results are truly incredible.”
“Better than laudanum?”
“Without a doubt, even though they’re both derived from opium.”
“Really?”
“The difference is in the way they’re produced. And with morphine, I can operate on my patients without them feeling pain.”
Fascinated, Juliette turned her face more fully toward his, allowing her to catch a glimpse of excitement in Florian’s deep blue eyes. “That’s astonishing,” she murmured, momentarily lost in the depth of his gaze and the passion with which he was speaking. “It’s amazing to think of the discoveries being made. The tool you mentioned for extracting the kidney stones is remarkable. I wonder who invented such a thing.”
“I can tell you.” Hesitance crept its way along his voice and he carefully added, “If you like.”
Genuinely riveted by the extent of his knowledge and eager for him to share it with her, Juliette quickly nodded. “When we were living in St. Giles, my brother was determined to ensure our education. He always felt that if we were well-read, we stood a better chance at improving our prospects.”
“That was very farsighted and wise of him. Considering how young he was at the time.”
Juliette nodded. “He was only eight years old when we lost our parents.” They shared a moment of silence before she continued. “When the debt collectors came, we fled our home to avoid being placed in different orphanages or, God forbid, workhouses.
