I wasn’t ready for a new relationship and I wasn’t sure if I ever would be. Even with a woman as perfect as her.
Just thinking of Aribella made my insides simultaneously clench and rejoice.
It was like she’d been created just for me. She knew how to handle my sharp edges and smooth them away. I’d never laid eyes on a more beautiful creature. The first time she appeared in front of me I’d sworn my heart stopped beating. Everything about her, from her soft voice to her kind heart, called to me.
And when we kissed …
She was my mate.
There was no denying it. I felt it and saw it with my own two eyes. The icy fire to my heart. The silver mist that surrounded us. But even as I’d stared in awe at the stardust particles that had hung in the air between and around us while the taste of her still lingered on my lips, dread had filled me.
And that was not the feeling that should have dominated me at that time. I was broken, and it had never been more obvious than in that moment.
Cold hard truth settled into my bones as I stood alone in the street, chilling me despite the humidity in the air.
I might never be able to trust in love again.
As much as I cared for Aribella, as much as my arms ached to hold her and something inside cried out for her when she wasn’t near, I couldn’t be the man she needed. The man she deserved. I was too broken. Ruined beyond repair.
My relationship with Rosaline had ended in heartbreak, scarring my body and soul.
Fate might have been pushing Aribella and I together, but I already cared too much for the redheaded beauty to risk spoiling her with my darkness. She’d fall in love with me and then I’d leave her broken, unable to commit. So I did the only thing I could to save her. To give her a chance at a life that didn’t include the ghosts of my past.
I re-hardened my heart of stone, and resolved to cut her out of my soul, one bloody slice at a time.
Chapter 16
Iyawned, reaching my arms above my head and stretching as I opened my eyes and smiled. Turning to wish Stryker good morning, I frowned when I saw the side of his bed was made and a note lay on top.
Had I slept in? Maybe he was already eating breakfast.
Sitting up, I grabbed the note and started reading. My stomach sank further with every word.
Aribella,
I wish you had come sooner. I wish that I’d met you before her. I have invisible scars which are deeper and harder to heal than the one you see on my face. I want to give myself to you, I want to fall in love with you, but my head won’t allow it. I’ve done that before and nearly paid for it with my life. I’m broken and you deserve a man who can give you his whole heart, without dragging you through a minefield.
I choked on a sob, and read the last few lines.
I’m sorry I left without saying goodbye, but this is for the best. Zander and Dawn will take care of you and if you need anything in your quest to help your people, send word and my secretary will give you whatever you ask.
Stryker
No.
He wouldn’t.
A numbness spread throughout my body as I processed what just happened. Last night things seemed okay. Maybe not perfect: he said he was afraid, but he seemed okay …
But he wasn’t.
Would I be okay if my lover tried to kill me in my sleep? No. I wouldn’t.
I had to go after him, tell him we could work on this together.
Rushing to get ready, I slipped on my dress and boots and raced down the stairs of the inn.
“Aribella!” Dawn’s voice came from a nearby table as I hurried through the dining area inside the pub. I stopped and turned to find her alone and holding a note. She was frowning. “I’m so sorry,” she said.
