‘Woman, you’re going to kill me.’He cut me off with an exasperated sigh that bled throughout our bond, bringing with it feelings of helplessness.‘I’m going to go fully gray and die of heartbreak.’
‘Sawyer, listen. Their power is tied to the alpha. And their land. They need me to survive,’I pressed, and he was quiet for a whole minute.
‘Demi, I’m in the middle of a war right now. I can’t really have an entire conversation. Will I see you in the morning or no?’
My throat pinched with unshed emotion.
‘No. But obviously—’
‘No?’I felt his pain slice into my chest.‘Demi, your parents are hiding in a bomb shelter. Raven just got here asking about you. I’m waiting for my future wife to show up so I can wrap my arms around her as I bury my father in the ground, and now you tell me you’re not coming back? What am I supposed to do with that?’
For someone who couldn’t have a conversation right now, he sure was chatty. Guilt wormed its way into my gut. He was right, it was awful—I was fucking awful for doing this to him in the middle of a war with his father dead. But…‘Sawyer, they wouldn’t help without me giving them something. Their land is dying, the people are hurting, and I’m not just going to leave them. It’s not who I am, and not who you fell in love with.’
I felt him soften. Tender feelings of love and compassion bled into me.
‘Okay, babe, I get it, but I can’t just traipse into the woods and camp out with you there. I’m alpha, my father just died, we are at war, and I have an ankle monitor on that we still can’t get off. What do you expect me to do?’
My heart panged at the mention of his father again. I wanted to be there with him, and I still didn’t know what this alpha stuff required of me.‘I know, and this won’t be like last time when I got lost in the Magic Lands. I can come see you. I’ll send the warriors in the morning at first light, and then I’ll check things out here and see how I can help. By tomorrow night I can zip back over and see you again and we can come up with a plan.’
There was silence and I felt his attention divided. Finally he spoke back to me, his voice strained.
‘Zip back over? Demi, my love, we are at war. Our woods are on fire. They’ve just released dark fey into the school grounds and the Ithaki are getting involved. It’s now or never. Come home and you can go to the Paladins after the war settles down, after my ankle bracelet comes off. I’ll go with you. I’ll live in a tent by your side, do whatever it takes, my love—just not now.’
A sob ripped from my chest, and I had to slap a hand over my mouth to muffle it.
‘Sawyer, the land is blackened and dying. They aren’t like your wolves, they will start to get sick too if I don’t step up to my responsibilities. I have to be here right now.’
He was silent so damn long I had to call his name again.
‘Sawyer?’
I felt my agony mix with his, merging together through our bond, coalescing like a tornado, threatening to rip us both in two.
‘Demi, loving you means I support whatever your desires are. If you really want to stay there and … help the Paladin people, then … I support you.’
My heart felt heavy, like a stone in my chest. Sawyer was the epitome of the perfect man and I felt like I was letting him down.
‘We will be together soon. I promise,’I assured him.
‘I gotta go now. Read the note I gave you, okay?’He sounded disappointed, but there was nothing more I could say. I’d completely forgotten about the note he’d shoved in my pocket when I’d seen him in the war room in his parents’ house.
‘I will. I love you, Sawyer. I love you so much. Thanks for supporting me.’
‘Goodnight, Demi. I love you too.’
I lay there for a moment letting this hollow feeling spread from my chest through my limbs. There was no good way out of this situation. It sucked no matter what. Either way, someone was going to be disappointed.
Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out the letter and sat up, leaning into the window and letting the outside porch light cast its glow onto the white paper.
I unfolded it, confused about what it was and how he could have written me a letter before he even knew I was coming here. He’d have had no time between the vampire attack at the hotel and getting his mother back to his house after his father’s death.
The second I saw his cursive script across the page, I finally let the sobs free.
Engagement speechwas scrolled across the top.
He’d written a speech for our special night, something I hadn’t even thought to do—one he never got to read.
My heart pounded against my chest as I read the next line.
