She was close enough that I could smell her lavender perfume. Everything about her seemed so real. It felt as if we were both alive, just standing on a beach having a conversation.
She reached out as if she wanted to touch me, but then pulled her hand back at the last moment.
“Tell me, child.”
I jumped right in. “The winter queen and the Dark Fae Lord have teamed up. They want to take over the Earth-side mecca. We have been waiting for their attack, preparing for a war, but they haven’t made a move yet. This is worrying me. I feel as if we are giving them time to set some huge plan into motion.”
The Red Queen’s face went from ethereal beauty to enraged monarch in seconds. That look was more like the woman I remembered. “How long have you been waiting for this attack?”
“Almost a month,” I told her.
A cunning light flickered across her eyes. “You cannot give them any more time. If they are taking this long, then they have much more than a battle planned. You need to go to the Otherworld. You need to take them out first before they succeed at whatever they are working toward.”
I wasn’t shocked by her advice. It had been what I was thinking all along. I had needed her reassurance, though, that I wasn’t acting rashly, that my actions would not end up making it worse for everyone. I wasn’t the same sort of ruler the Red Queen was, but that didn’t mean her years of experience were not valuable. If she thought seeking to take them out first was a viable option, then it was one worth considering.
Violet paled, as if that was possible, and I could feel her shaking next to me. “No! There has to be another way. We can’t go back there! That land is…” Her voice cracked.
Violet went through some horrific torture at the hands of the winter queen. I had seen some of it in our dream sharing. But, in moments likethis, with pain and fear shining in those pale eyes, I saw the true depth of her scars.
I wasn’t sure if I should touch her or not, but my arms ached with the need to comfort her. “It’s okay, Vi. You don’t have to come. I would never expect you to go back there again. You have spent enough time in that world.”
She fell silent, wrapping her arms around herself while she looked down at her feet. A pure sort of fury ripped through me. This was what abuse did. It crushed strong and vibrant people into quivering shells. The winter queen did this! She broke the light within my most cherished friend. She would do that to all of my people if I let her, her and the Dark Fae Lord. They would break them all down, crush their souls and spirits. I could never let that happen.
I looked up at the Red Queen and gave her a tight smile. “Thank you. I agree with you, this is the best plan. I must take her out before she has a chance to bring her plan to fruition. Before she has a chance to harm any more of my people.”
I would never let them touch my city. My mecca. My shifters. I was going to kill them both. I didn’t take murder lightly, but I had to do this for my people. To save us all. Violet shifted her gaze from her feet to the ocean, arms still wrapped around herself. As soon as we got out of here, we were going to have that longconversation. It was time for her to share the burden.
I turned back to the Red Queen. “Thank you for your advice. We must go now. I have an assassination to plan.”
Her face was smooth again, but dark shadows slithered across her eyes. I found myself asking, “Are you happy here?”
Some of the passivity faded from her face; she blinked rapidly as if trying to compose herself again. “I thought I would be. To live forever, even if in this state, but…” She let the sentence linger and I nodded.
“If I can find a way to free you … to set your soul free, I will.” I didn’t love her. I didn’t know her well enough to love her, but she was my biological mother. And she had done more than I realized for me in my life. She had loved me in her own weird way.
She looked taken aback, an expression I had never seen on her face before. I marveled at how different she appeared to be … less robotic … less cold. Maybe being stuck here had given her time to reflect on who she was. It was a shame our people couldn’t have seen some of her warmer side.
Sucking in a deep breath for fortitude, I turned to Violet. “It’s time to go home, Vi.”
She pulled her gaze from the ocean, returning from whatever horror was holding her captive in her mind. Her eyes were shadowed and haunted, but she didn’t hesitate to reach out and touch me. When her hand came around my forearm, we were pulled back into the mecca crystal room.
Without a word, Violet turned and walked away from the stone, disappearing out into the library room. I followed her.
“Violet,” I said, but she continued walking fast toward the door. “Violet!” I shouted this time. She paused, her back rigid as her shoulders shook. Finally she turned to face me, tears spilling down her cheeks.
My heart was aching so hard it felt like someone had punched my chest in. “Tell me,” I begged her.
She bit her bottom lip and stared at me, those tears still silently tracing her porcelain cheeks. When her breathing turned into ragged gasps, I stepped forward and pulled her into my arms. She collapsed against me, her body shaking so hard I almost couldn’t keep her upright. Our energy crashed together, but for once neither of us cared.
“I still see it in my head,” she said in a broken whisper. “Every time I close my eyes, I have to relive the days I spent in the Otherworld.”
I rubbed her back gently, pulling away so I could lead her to two high-backed armchairs. When we were sitting, facing each other, I reached out and grasped her hands. “You don’t have to talk about it, Vi, but … I’m here, and it might help. Maybe part of the reason you’re being haunted is because you’re holding it all inside. Pretending it didn’t happen.”
She swallowed hard, stray tears still sprinkling her eyelashes. “I thought if I just acted normal, then eventually I would feel normal. And to a certain degree that has worked. I’m genuinely happy with Nikoli, happy when I’m around you and Kade, and all your overabundance of love. But … at night, I can’t escape. I’ve barely slept since we got back.”
I waited, sensing she had more to say. Her next words came out in a big rush.
“The winter queen tortured me, which was fine. The physical cruelty barely even bothered me. I have a high tolerance for pain, as you well know.” Her breath caught in her throat as she choked out the next part. “But, it wasn’t just physical torture. She’s an expert at the psychological too. She got in my head…” A ragged whisper of words: “You, and Blaine, and Winnie … you died, over and over again, in a different way every day. Nothing I did could ever save you. There was no way for me to tell it wasn’t real. I hadto live it, it was … I also died a million times, holding your bodies in my arms.”
