Chapter Sixty-Eight
‘Would you rather have sex with someone watching, or watch someone have sex?’
‘Wow. A toughie.’ I scrunch up my nose. ‘With an audience you’d need pretty good multi-tasking skills. All that sucking in your stomach, keeping your legs at an angle where bits don’t wobble, all the while looking like you’re in the throes of ecstasy thing. Can’t say I’ve ever really been grabbed by porn—’
‘That wasn’t an answer.’ He cuts off my rambling, deeming it unworthy of commenting. And I suppose it is because sex with Kai is all consuming and therefore there’s no brain power left for consideration of wobbly bits. ‘And in this instance, watching someone have sex implies watching the real thing, not porn.’
‘I can’t imagine getting a kick out of someone watching me have sex, let alone the other way around. So I guess I’dratherwatch someone. Give them the performance anxiety, instead.’
Kai smirks as I abandon my silverware, bringing both hands to my face. Having suggested we play this game over dinner, under the auspices of getting to know you better, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised we’ve veered a bit off the path.
I know who I blame.
We’ve had a pretty cruisey day. After Kai had pulled himself and his hangover together, we’d decided to take the opportunity to play tourist. Though I vetoed the beach because, you know, sand and waves. Instead we played mini-golf at the place where I’d worked as a girl, drinking slushies that stained our lips and eating fairy-floss and ice-blocks until we felt sick.Or maybe that was just me.We’d then hit the designer shops at Surfers Paradise, looking like a couple of hobo’s, or derros as we say over here.Colourful derros, blue lips and black Amex card. It was a bit like that scene inPretty Womanwhere the snobby cow sales assistants turn Julia Roberts away. Or it might’ve been, if Kai didn’t just exude class from every pore.
Elbows against the table, I peek from my splayed fingers, lowering them again as Kai schools his expression, shaking his head in mock admonishment.
‘You astound me. A voyeur?’
‘Tough choices.’ I lift one shoulder in a shrug. ‘Okay, my turn.’ I take a deep breath, because if we’re playing dirty... ‘Would you rather have amazing oral—’
‘God, yes.’ He gives one definitive nod, unable to bite back an audacious grin.It’s bloody dazzling.It’s not as though he doesn’t smile lots, because he does, but most are more difficult to decipher, usually holding a hint of lazy mocking. So this smile, this spontaneous smile, is all the more special for its artlessness.
‘I wasn’t offering, and you’re bending the rules again,’ I reprove, even as I grin myself. ‘So the best oralever, then abstaining for the rest of the month, or just, like, average sex for the whole month?’
‘Average sex?’ he repeats, fork poised midway to his mouth. He lowers it, almost as though the phrase puzzles him, so much so that he abandons the remains of his steak. Steak that I’ve just cooked on the barbecue after it became clear he didn’t even know how to switch the gas on.
‘Define abstain.’
I roll my eyes in a gesture of frustration. ‘Like a nun. You get nun.’
‘What, you mean nothing? Not even a quick fuck?’
‘They do say abstinence makes the heart grow—hang on, that’s not right, it’s—’
‘Absence, sweetheart.Though abstinence would definitely makesomethinggrow harder. Painfully so.’ He shakes his head indulgently. Not only is sex with Kai beyond mundane, but I can’t imagine not wanting to well,do itall the time.
Should’ve made the question a week, not a month.
‘Too far-fetched a notion to even contemplate answering,’ he says, interrupting my pondering. ‘Badly played, kitten. You’ll appreciate mine, it’s much more straightforward. Oral. Would you rather be the recipient or the beneficiary?’
‘Both,’ I answer wholly without thought and blushing furiously as a consequence.
‘It was my understanding that the game is calledwould you rather?’
‘You can do both at the same time, you know.’
Maybe if I can dig a big enough hole, I’ll be able to hide in it?
One eyebrow sardonically raised, he pushes away his abandoned plate, drawing his glass nearer. ‘Have I been remiss?’
‘What?’
‘Is this...mutualitysomething you’ve a partiality for?’
‘No,’ I answer uncertainly. ‘That is, it’s just—it’s just difficult to choose.’ How could I pick between coming undone as the result of his exquisite skills, and the heady but rarely occurring occasion of being in charge of his pleasure?
‘But together? At the same time?’
