Love. How’d I get to this place, anyhow? It’s like falling into an uncovered manhole. One minute, I’m happy, minding my own business, just plodding along, stoked that a girl as classy as Chastity would have anything to do with me. And the next thing? Boom! Down the fucking hole I go. I’m falling and struggling in the dark. And when I do finally hit the bottom, it all makes sense. I’m in love. Only, I’m alone and naked, and shivering, worrying how long I’ll be in the hole alone.
Far out, I’ve turned into a maudlin fucker. It doesn’t help that I haven’t had more than a few minutes alone with her since I’d arrived tonight. A quick birthday kiss and a few words, and eyes that said a million things, though none of them concrete, before she’s called away to greet someone else. But not before making a promise that we’d talk later.
Talk.
‘Cheer up, pal. It might never happen.’
Keir passes me a tumbler of something amber. I bring it to my nose and pull a face. Music plays in the background, people milling around the open plan space, most dressed in black as the invitation suggested. It’s not like the house parties I usually get invited to, but then, Chastity is a girl with taste. That must be why she likes me. And because she likes me and because I want to get into her undies, I mean, good books, I’ve toed the line in my dress tonight. Chastity was right the day I’d ambushed her at the studio; I do like a bit of Tom Ford. Tonight, this suit is jet black and teamed with a tailored shirt and black tie.
Keir had mentioned I look like a penguin, but he’s just jealous, I reckon.
‘Get it down you,’ he instructs. His expression is amused as he points at my glass. ‘What whisky cannot cure, there is no cure for. Or in other words, it’ll cheer your face up.’
I don’t normally drink this stuff, but then again, I’m not normally such an introspective sap. ‘I accept your magical piss water,’ I say, raising the glass. ‘And if it doesn’t make feel better, may the chunder be on your shoes tonight.’
Keir’s gaze flicks down. ‘You’d better not vomit on these. They’re custom-made.’
With a tip of my head, I chuck the drink down my throat. ‘Fuck! How do you drink that stuff?’
Keir laughs. ‘It’s not so bad. Then again, it’s not Macallan, either.’ He studies the amber liquid in his glass.
‘What the fuck am I gonna do?’
I hadn’t meant to speak because if I had, the words wouldn’t have sounded nearly so plaintive or have the effect they’re having on Keir right now. His expression is frozen in a look resembling horror. See, blokes don’t talk about this shit. In fact, his current look reminds me of a rabbit sensing a fox. Only, the rabbit has realised the fox isn’t hungry. He just wants to talk about his emotions and shit. And the rabbit? He’d rather have his flesh torn from the bone and die a nasty painful death than speak of love.
‘Fuck off, would you?’ I sort of grunt. ‘Go hang out with your girl.’
‘I would be, but she’s hell-bent on interfering with the catering under the guise ofhelp-ing.’ He makes those poncy air quotation marks with his fingers, which is difficult, given the glass he has in his hand.
‘Fucking catering.’
‘It’s not like you to have something bad to say about free food.’
‘It’s not the food.’ The food, in fact, is very decent. ‘And fuck you very much about the freebie thing,’ I add with a glare. ‘You’re just jealous that I can eat what I like and maintain my six pack, meanwhile you’ve got to watch your weight like a girl.’
‘I’ll watch your weight in a minute,’ he bounces back at me. ‘We’ll see how far I can kick your arse across the lawn. What the fuck is wrong with the catering?’ he asks when I don’t bite.
‘Him. The prick who brought the stuff.’
Keir’s gaze follows the direction of my own. ‘He’s Chastity’s neighbour. He lives across the road, apparently. And she got a good deal on the catering, Paisley said.’
‘I reckon the bastard wants to give her more than mate’s rates.’ I glare in the direction of Chastity and the tall fucker next to her. Dark hair and slim built, he looks like he’d be more at home on a yacht rather than in a restaurant, and though I hate to admit it, the fucker looks almost as good in his suit as I do. Almost.
I’ve got my eye on you, mate. And if you touch the small of her back one more time, I might just twist the fucker off.Except I won’t. At least not tonight. Not on her birthday.
Keir opens his mouth, then closes it again. ‘Am I missing something here?’
‘I dunno. Are you?’
‘Are you and Chas serious?’ I frown because I hate that nickname with a fucking passion. It’s too common or garden for someone as special as her. ‘Oi. I asked you a question.’
‘Are we a thing? If a thing isin love, then I’m half of that thing. And half of a thing just isn’t a thing at all.’
‘That’s a load of—’
‘Things,’ I finish for him, agreeing.
‘I was gonna say bullshit. But you know how you find out?’ My head swings to his, pathetically hopeful. ‘You use your mouth. Ah, fuck! Wipe that expression off your face and don’t twist my advice. I don’t want to know where your mouth has been.’
