Yep, that’s me. The brown girl cliché.
Not only did I lust after my brother’s bestie, but the I wanted the white boy next door bad.
Taking a deep breath, I blow it out slowly as Addy turns away when I don’t reply, making his way to mom. We all have mixed feelings about my dad’s death—I imagine my mother most of all. There has to be a big hole in her heart and life now that he’s gone. Part of me wishes I could be here for her.
I look around the house, remembering the years I grew up here. The good parts, at least. I don’t know if I’d ever be able to come back here for good. Even if I really wanted to.
Chapter 2
Josh
I can’t believe I’m back here. Not really. Ten years gone in the blink of an eye. Sometimes it seems like only yesterday I was hanging around these streets. And other times it seems like a lifetime away.
But it feels good to be home again. I’m back to see my sister who just had a baby. No man, just a baby. But that’s okay. We’ve all got to live our own lives, or else, what’s the point? My baby nephew is adorable with his shock of blond hair and rosebud mouth. It almost makes me want one of the little tikes myself. Not that it’ll happen. I’ll probably end up with a dog instead.
‘Don’t fuss, Josh,’ Rachel, my sister says, when I try to make sure the baby is tucked up and comfortable in his bassinet. I’d also made her a cuppa and suggested she put the TV on and curl up while she can. She must be knackered. She’s only been out of hospital a few days and she’s already talking about going shopping. Women are amazing, generally. It’s just a shame the ones I’m around are mostly light in brain capacity and body weight. And conversational skills. Glamour is the curse of the hospitality industry, which is where I’ve made my living.
‘I was just making sure he was okay.’ I tell her, tucking his swaddling around him. ‘You know, comfortable.’
Rach rolls her eyes, but she smiles. ‘Believe me, when he’s not happy, you’ll know. He’s got some lungs on him. He can’t half bellow.’
Secretly, I’m sure she’s happy someone is taking care of her for a change. Our grandmother raised us both when our parents passed away. I was so young I can barely remember them. Rachel was like my second mum, even though she’s only a few years older than me. I’m not afraid to say that these two women are responsible for the person I am today. The good bits, at least.
‘So,’ I say, sitting down in the chair opposite hers. ‘What’s been going on while I’ve been gone.’
‘Do I look like The Gazette?’ she responds. ‘If you wanted to know, you should’ve stayed home.’ But she’s only teasing.I think.
‘So you didn’t miss me?’
‘I missed you like a hole in my shoe.’
Holes in our shoes weren’t a joke when we grew up. Gran did her best, but we weren’t the wealthiest of people. Not like some of the neighbours.
‘Back packing around the world like a vagrant,’ she grumbles. ‘Coming home with a tan.’
‘Come on, Rach. Don’t be jel. I’ll take you on holiday if you like.’
‘I do like. But maybe not until the little prince is about twenty-two. What are you laughing at? Have you seen parents when they come back from holiday? They look like theyneeda holiday!’
But back packing was great. I’d travelled through Europe finding all the best spots. For a kid who’d rarely eat veg, the experience was a bit mad. I tried all kinds of food from all kind of places, eating and enjoying the local produce wherever I stayed. I worked in olive groves, wine fields, even on fishing trawler or two. In the end, I’d made my living from importing a line of fine foods and wines, eventually buying a restaurant or two. I’m lucky enough now to travel across the globe in a very different style to my backpacking days. First class all the way these days.
I’ve lived in lots of countries, visited lots of places, and sampled women, life, and fine wine along the way. And now I’m back home, partly by necessity, partly by choice. Seeing the old places has rekindled a kind of fond nostalgia in me. I have enough money to take time off from my business indefinitely, and that’s what I plan to do. I want to settle down for a while. Put down some roots. Spend time with my family. Kick back for a while.
‘So you’re not gonna fill me in on all the town news?’
‘I’ve been in hospital squeezing something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of-’
I put my hands over my ears. ‘Shuddup. There are somethings a brother should never hear.’
‘Well, I don’t know what’s going on around here. Up until the baby a month ago, I worked sixty hours a week.’
Rachel’s in corporate law. It’s a job she loves, but I’m not sure how it’ll lend itself to motherhood. We never sold the house after gran died, and Rachel’s been living in it since then. I’m sure the neighbours were over the moon to see it get a lick of paint. To see the yard tidied. Nice cars on the driveway. Gran should’ve sold the place years ago. It would of set her up financially for years. But she wouldn’t, insisting the house was ours. Our heritage and right.
‘When are you going to give him a name?’ I say, referring to the baby now snuffling.
‘I was thinking of calling him after dad.’
‘Ralph?’ I ask, incredulous. ‘Do you want him to get beaten up at school?’
