Long after the horrors of the arena have been left behind, long after the streets of the capital have quieted, I sit up in my bed with the moonlight slanting into my room, my arms wrapped around my legs. My eyes are closed. Constantine has fallen into an uneasy sleep, his dream state shallow and rhythmic in the way I’m used to sensing through our bond. I concentrate on keeping my emotions even, but my mind keeps replaying the feeling of Red’s heartbeat.
Red is here in Cardinia.Here!
My heart lurches even now, hours later, at the thought, and it takes all my effort to keep myself steady. I always feel Red’s heartbeat, of course, but the pulse of it had been so strong in the arena that I could look in the direction it came from and imagine him there in the stands. Even though he was far enough away that I couldn’t pinpoint exactly where he was, I knew it was him.
It washim.
I draw in a slow, shaky breath and let it out through my mouth, again and again.
Maybe his presence had given me the courage to rage againstthe Premier, to stand there and refuse to kill Adena. Maybe I would have felt compelled to do it without him. I don’t know. I don’t know. All I remember is Adena’s eyes locked on mine, unrelenting and furious.
She was ready to die at my hands. I could see that in her, the familiar look she used to get on the warfront whenever it looked like we might lose our lives at the hands of Ghosts.
But I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. And her eyes had widened instead in disbelief. Not only had I rebelled against the Premier’s command in my mind, but Adena had sensed it. Seen it for herself. So had Red. I’d looked back at Constantine and dared him to punish me in front of that crowd by ordering his guards to kill Adena anyway.
But he hadn’t. I knew he wouldn’t. If he did, the entire audience would have known that he’d been forced to make his other guards do something that I’d refused to do. They would have realized that his hold on his Skyhunter isn’t as solid as he’s promised and—worse—that I can act independently of his authority.
Better to play along instead. Let the crowd think that Constantine had planned to pardon Adena of her actions all along, that she had performed so well in the maze the Premier himself felt generous and wanted her to live.
But howlongis he going to let her live? I know, deep in my bones, that he will make sure Adena and Aramin die in the next games. He’ll never let them survive and give me that satisfaction. This time I’m going to be forced to stand by, forced to watch the warfront family I’ve had since childhood be slaughtered for sport.
The thought sends me shaking again. No, no, no. I can’t let this happen. But how can I possibly stop it by myself, when I’m trapped by the Premier’s side?
I wince and clutch my head in my hands. This is going to hurt my mother. What was I thinking? But what elsecouldI have done?
My mother’s safety or Adena’s life. It is not a choice.
Red, I call through our bond. I feel my voice echoing futilely, like sound through a tunnel with no end.Look what is happening to everyone I love. Why can’t you just stay away and protect yourself?
I sit with my head in my hands and count the minutes. In the morning, I will have to walk back out there with Constantine. Stand ready at the Premier’s beck and call. Shadow General Caitoman on tours of the city. Dole out punishments as they see fit. The solstice celebrations will continue. There will be banquets and dancing. There will be another game, and this time I will see Adena and Aramin murdered, I know it. And I’ll have to attend all of it.
Someday, I remind myself again and again. Someday, this will be over. The rebellion will unfurl, Raina and Mayor Elland will turn the country against Constantine, and the unrest stirring in all corners of the Federation will finally crack open. And I will be at the heart of it, taking him down.
The thought of it is so clear and sharp that I immediately force my feelings back into line. Push all images of Raina out of my head. Stop thinking about Red. Stop thinking about Adena and Aramin. I focus on stilling my emotions until my heart beats at a normal pace again, slow and steady.
I don’t know when I drift off. I’m only aware I’ve fallen asleep because when I suddenly stir, I am heading down a rope bridge suspended in a fog of darkness. Down below is an endless chasm. And somewhere ahead is a land of pale mist, its air pulsing with the slight, steady rhythm of Red’s heart.
I must have opened myself up again, enough to let my link with Redcome through. Our dreams have bound us together, letting us meet once more in this singular state of unconsciousness.
The realization sends me into a new panic.No, Red. Go away.
But in this state, I’m helpless. Gradually, Red’s mind responds to mine. Fragments of his surroundings materialize around me.
He’s somewhere on the outskirts of Cardinia, outside of the city and beyond the bridges that stretch over the river encircling the capital. Out here, there are cheaper installations displayed in the same pattern as those inside the city—narrower thoroughfares radiating out from the city walls, with old bits of twisted steel taken from stolen fields and razed forests arching along their paths. Messier apartment towers sprawl outward. Many of them are worn down, some of them painted on. One of these towers casts its shadow into the alley where Red’s camped for the night.
He’s curled on the ground in some quiet, abandoned corner. And beside him is a companion—a Striker with a distinct, graceful presence.
Jeran?Jeran!All the breath leaves me in a rush.
In my dream, I feel as if I’m standing right at his side. The moonlight cuts blue and gray across the narrow alley, slanting an arc of light against his face.
Red opens his eyes and sits up. Then he stares directly at me. Is he really awake? At first, his stare looks wild, like he can’t quite be sure where he is. Strands of his metallic hair cling to the side of his face.
“Talin?” he whispers aloud. Then he blinks and really sees me for the first time. He realizes we have linked in our dreams. And his entire face changes.
He reaches for me before I can say anything more, then pauses, his hands stopping before they touch me as if he’s afraid.
Why are you here?I whisper in our dream this time, and the soundseems to come out like a sob.I told you to stay in the wilds outside Newage.
