When I look up at Grady again, his forehead is creased. “You sure you’re okay? You look all ... squirrely.”
I’m not entirely sure what that means, but I know it means I’m making a face of someone who isn’t fine, which is dumb because I am. Fine, that is. I make a concerted effort to relax my expression. “Tell me more about the expo you’re going to.” I raise an eyebrow at him. “Does that mean you’ve finally decided to go through with the pub?”
He shrugs. “Eh, I dunno. An Irish guy opening a pub. Is it too cliché?”
For as long as I’ve known him, Grady has been talking about his pub. Planning for his pub. Scouting just the right location for his pub. He has the seed money for it, but he seems reluctant to commit. A part of me wonders if it isn’t the Irish stereotype, but something else that’s holding him back. Then again, a business is a big investment, so maybe he’s just making sure this is the right path for him.
“Just don’t fall in love with Knoxville and decide you’re going to leave Chicago.” I meant for it to sound like a joke, and I hope my voice doesn’t betray too much emotion at the statement.
Grady’s face softens. He nudges me with his knee under the table. “I’m not goin’ anywhere.” His eyes move to something just over my shoulder, and he frowns. “Ermmm ...”
I start to glance behind me, before reminding myself that under no circumstances am I going to look at that part of the bakery during this “date.” “What?” A terrible thought strikes me. “Are they kissing?” I whisper.
“Noooo.” Grady drags out the word longer than necessary his brow furrowed in confusion. “Do you know that fella or something?”
Blank face. Blank face! “Why?” I ask as innocently as I can.
“He keeps staring over here. I swear, he just glared at me for smiling at you.”
Despite myself, I look over my shoulder. Wes and Harmony are seated at a table a few feet away. They seem to be talking and laughing, but sure enough, after just a few seconds, like he can’t help himself, Wes darts his eyes over to us. Seeing us both watching him, he looks quickly away again.
“He’s probably just nervous,” I hedge.
“Sure,” Grady returns, sounding unconvinced. “I always stare at pretty girls when I’m nervous, too. Really calms me right down.”
I glare at him coolly to show that I’m not impressed. “Your dry Irish wit is not appreciated right now, thank you very much.”
“Hmm,” is all Grady says in return.
I wait until he’s taking a sip of his water, and therefore hopefully won’t notice, before I glance back over my shoulder to see if Wes is still looking at me. His leg is jackhammering like crazy under the table, but at least for the moment, he’s smiling and nodding at whatever Harmony’s saying. My stomach twists at the sight.
Pretend, I remind myself.It’s just pretend.Although ... is it? When Wes and I met, he was pretending to be someone he wasn’t, and we developed real feelings.Ideveloped real feelings, anyway. My gaze darts back and forth between Harmony and Wes. It’s hard to know what I’m supposed to feel. Jealousy, that he might actually start to like Harmony. Worry for Harmony, if he’s only using her. Frustration, that once again I’ve been sidelined, watching everyone else get to live their lives while I just wait around to be useful.
Then, as if drawn to me like a magnet, Wes’s eyes snap up to mine. I hurriedly twist back around in my chair and find Grady watching me with a knowing expression. “Hmmmmmmmm,” he says, drawing it out longer this time.
“Oh, hush, you,” I tell him.
Lyle’s voice cuts through the room. “Hang on just a moment, lovebirds!” he tells Wes and Harmony, before addressing everyone in the bakery all together. “The director wants to get some shots of just the two leads, so we need to clear out the room so we can fit in some additional equipment.”
The seasoned extras in the room seem to understand what that means, and theyall rise to leave. I rise after them, willing myself with all the strength I can muster not to look over at Wes and Harmony again.
Grady stands. “Are you off for the day, then?” he asks me. “You wanna go grab a bite?”
Because the room is already significantly less full of people and noise, I wonder if his question carried over to Wes. And I wonder even more what he’ll think about overhearing that—a man asking me out for a meal.Hedoesn’t know that Grady is just a friend. To the ignorant ear, it might sound almost date-like.
Except, no! I’m not wondering what Wes thinks about any of that. I don’t care. It’s nothing to me. Nothing, I say!
“Sure,” I tell Grady. “That sounds great.”
Lyle crosses over to us before we can go. “Sorry to get you in and out of here so quickly. It’s usually a longer process, but the bakery is on a tight schedule.” He gives me a meaningful look. “And I just heard Perry might be stopping by on set, so it might be a good time to take off.”
Ah, yes. The man who’s trying to fire me. I nod to show Lyle I understand. “Got it. We’ll get out of your way.”
“I’m gonna run to the jacks before they kick us out of here for good,” Grady tells me, motioning toward the bathrooms near the back of the room.
While I wait for him, I watch the production crew as they begin the difficult task of trying to figure out how to fit in the second camera. It looks like this might take a while. I move myself up against the wall to take up as little space as possible.
Despite my better judgment, I cast my eyes around the room, searching for ...nobody.I am definitely not looking for anybody in particular or wondering what he’s doing or if he’s gazing into Harmony’s eyes adoringly or giving her that crinkly smile of his that makes my heart skip a beat every time. I am definitely not doing that because it would be stupid and pointless and definitely, definitely not something I would do.
