While I’m brave, I’m not that brave to go kiss Major, but I touch the middle of his back, whispering a good morning to my grump too.
“So y’all had a good night?” Jesse smirks. I wasn’t quiet about it, so he probably heard it all.
“Slept like a baby.” I smile and dig into my breakfast.
Major joins us at the table, yet his eyes don’t move from me. These guys have good noses, and they don’t need to hear the moans last night to know what happened. But I pretend there’s nothing different with me. I just don’t care to hide my feelings anymore. I want them to know exactly how much I want to stay. And apparently, perfuming is the only language these Alphas understand.
“This can’t happen.” Major finally breaks the silence, obviously frustrated with the rest of us.
“And what exactly is this?” I blink in innocence.
His jaw clenches. “We aren’t your pack, Veda. They shouldn’t touch you.”
That last command comes out gruffly as he watches his packmates. No one reacts to this. Major is used to having the last word, so this doesn’t really surprise me.
I take a bite of toast and nod, resting on the back of the chair.
“You see, Major, I’ve heard that my whole life. Grandpa always liked to shame me for looking at anyone.” I don’t miss his wince when the words are out of my mouth, but I keep going. “For a long time, I was ashamed when a man told me I was pretty. When someone offered to carry my bags. When they even opened the door because Grandpa said I was leading them on. I believed my whole life that I was doing something wrong by just existing.”
“Veda—” he says, but Ishake my head.
“Until very recently, I’ve never come with anyone but my own fingers.” I shrug. “So no, I’m not going to stop, and I’m not going to feel ashamed for this. Got it?”
My trembling hands lift the toast for a bite again. Everything I said needed to be said, but I still blush and shake. Years of repression won’t disappear with one night of pleasure, but I’ll fight every single day.
Soon, I’m going to be raising my little girl, and she will never hear the things I heard growing up. I want to cleanse myself from the bullshit I was raised on. I have to make sure I own myself before I can be an example to her, and you better believe I’m not going to let him shame me, too.
“I’m sorry.” He swallows thickly. “I don’t want to control you, Veda. I’m just worried. I don’t want to see you and them hurt when the mating celebration comes along, and you go away with another pack. Then what happens? You’re not going to be here to pick up the pieces.”
The excited bubble inside me bursts, and I deflate. I don’t want them to break because of me. I don’t ever want to see Jesse or Derrick cry.
“You don’t need to worry about that, darlin’.” Derrick’s voice is firm, with no room for arguments.
My eyes flick to him, and I’m not sure if I can believe his words, but Jesse nods alongside him. “We know what is at stake. I’d prefer one day with you rather than nothing at all.”
It’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard in my life, and I jump from my chair into his arms. I’m not thinking straight and want to hug him. Jesse has always made me feel so wanted and at home. He brightens my world, and I want to be that for him. Never sadness, only good things.
“Don’t worry about what’s going to happen in weeks from now,” he says firmly.
“I don’t want you to hate me,” I whisper.
Jesse smiles, shaking his head. “That’s never going to happen, sweetheart. Never. I’m going to love you till the end of my days.”
I’m kissing him before I think about where we are. His strong arms close around me, and mine wind around his neck. Jesse is such a good kisser. He always knows when to go soft and when to go hard. I’m a puddle with his kiss, my perfume so strong that even I can taste it in the air.
We move apart, and he smiles in that way that gets me every time. I turn around, but I don’t move from his lap, and my face falls as I notice Major is not here anymore.
“He’s fine,” Derrick says when he notices the crease forming between my brows at his brother’s absence. “We all make choices. This is his.”
My plan was to bring them all to my nest. I want Major too, but it’s not right to tempt him when he’s right. This might end in disaster, and if the others are okay with betting on me, I have to make peace with the fact that Major doesn’t want any part of us.
“Come on, finish your breakfast, and I’ll take you to Storm.”
The promise of seeing my favorite wild mare has me smiling a little. I try to stand to return to my seat, but Derrick tsks.
“You stay right where you are. I’ll grab the plate for you.”
Jesse hums in agreement, his arms holding me tighter until I laugh and accept that this is my place in life.
