Taking a deep breath, I step into Beckett’s apartment, knowing I’m not strong enough to keep whatever is about to happen from happening.
Chapter 30
Beckett
“Waithere.I’llberight back,” I say, desperate to get out of my snow-covered clothes, but equally as concerned that Finley is about to bolt again. “Don’t leave.”
As I just witnessed, Finley Blake is not the type of woman to wait around when she’s decided she’s going to do something. Especially not when the man she’s waiting for is someone she’s been avoiding for weeks. The one she went out in a fucking whiteout in order to avoid.
It’s truly astounding how royally I fucked things up with her.
All because I had to open my damn mouth.
That deep sense of need that I thought I couldn’t bear any longer? Way less painful than having her dart from the room anytime I enter. Or the nights at home that were never a problem before but now are unbearably lonely.
I quickly change into a clean pair of sweats, throwing on the thickest Yeti hoodie I own before hustling out to the living room.Finley’s sitting on the couch in her usual spot, a lost look on her face as she stares out my window.
“Here.” I hand her the extra pair of sweats I grabbed. “You can change in the guest room. Or the bathroom. A hot shower might be nice. For you,” I say, before forcing my mouth closed. Rambling is not helping this situation.
“Are you okay?” she asks quietly, and my heart aches at the worry in her tone.
“A little chilly, but otherwise totally fine.” I spin in a circle. “See? The cold doesn’t bother me.”
“I think that’s supposed to be my line.” She stands slowly, her eyes scanning me. Stepping closer, she reaches out a hand, her warmth burning into my skin as she touches my cheek. “Why would you do that, Beckett?”
“It wasn’t safe.” I’m not sure what she doesn’t get about this. I would follow her anywhere: a snowstorm, the desert, the fucking moon if it means I can keep her safe.
Her thumb gently caresses my cheek, and I can’t help but lean into it. “You could’ve gotten hurt,” she says.
“I know. But I couldn’t force myself to care. I just needed to make sure you were okay. That’s all that mattered to me.”
We stand there for a moment, her fingers lightly brushing my face, our gazes locked.
Finally, I say the words I’ve been trying to say for the last two weeks. “I’m so sorry, Fin.”
She cocks her head to the side slightly. “For what?”
“For ruining our friendship.”
She lets out a breath that could be a sigh or a chuckle. “That’s not at all what happened.”
After dropping her hand, she takes the clothes from me. “You have nothing to be sorry for, Beckett. Truly. I’m the one who should apologize. So, I’m sorry I’ve acted like a child lately.”
“You don’t need to—”
She holds up a hand, cutting me off. “I do. Our friendship—you—means so much to me. And I acted like you didn’t. It wasn’t right.”
I stare at her, not sure what to say, when all I want to do is confess that this is so much more than friendship. That I want more. That I wanteverythingwith her.
Instead, when she steps around me to head into the bathroom, I let her go. I won’t put her in an awkward spot again, even if it means popping every thought of more as it bubbles to the surface.
“I put on the Phantoms game,” I tell Finley when she exits the bathroom a few minutes later. “I also pulled the comforter off my bed. Turns out, I don’t own a blanket.”
When she walks over, I smile at the way my clothes fully engulf her smaller frame. “You look good, Fin.”
She lightly punches my arm as she sits in her spot on the couch. I throw our makeshift blanket over her lap, taking the opportunity to cuddle slightly closer.
For the body heat, of course.
