She stared at him. He was surely joking. Or he had gone mad.
He touched her lips with his fingers.
“Come on, there’s a good little darling.”
“Don’t call me d-d-darling.”
“Do you not like that, dar—Caro?”
“I hate it because I love it.” She was sobbing again. “I love it and I know you call all the others darling, too.”
“Now, Caro—”
“You get me wet with how you talk to me, but I know it’s all the same talk you give to all the other girls. You are just saying the same thing to them. It’s nothing to do with m-me!”
She wept.
He slid off her.
“How do you know that?” His voice was very soft as if he were talking to a child. “How do you know how I talk to other women?”
She continued to sob. He laid his hand flat on her stomach.
“How do you know?”
“I know!”
“There’s only one other girl I’ve ever called darling. Just one. Her name was also Caro. She was a serving girl at another lord’s manor and she came into my bedchamber and she was so brave and so beautiful and made me feel . . . well, she made me feel quite special that I had been singled out by her, for her affection. And that she wanted me to be her first.”
“I d-don’t believe you.”
“Why?”
“Because I heard you c-c-allherd-d-d-darling.”
“You’re wrong. I called her Lady Starling and Horatia and was sorely tempted to call her a vengeful bitch with nothing better to do than to chase after men who don’t want her. But I restrained myself.”
Starling. Darling. Had she really heard darling? Maybe she had been mistaken.
“B-but I’m not little. You saylittled-d-darling.”
“I say little because, for whatever reason, dar—Caro, you make me feel very protective.”
“I don’t n-n-need you to protect me.”
He gave her the sad eyes he had given her in her bedchamber when she had told himnoto future meetings, to marriage. When she had saidnoto going to the exhibition with him. But there was also a trace of the look she had seen when she had accused him of marrying her for her dowry, when she had said they couldn’t have children yet.
“No?”
“No,” she whispered.
He took his hand off her stomach. She felt a lurch in her chest.
“Of course, you don’t need it. You’re very capable. Far more capable than I am. I just hoped you wouldn’t mind if I felt that way.”
Why did she have to hurt this man? She had to stop it or her marriage would turn into her parents’ marriage, with her acting the part of her father.
“Phineas St. John . . .”Phineath Thinjin.Could there be a worse name in her mouth than Augustus? “Aug-g-g-g-gustus.”Auguthtuth.
