He freezes and registers these two words.
‘Look, Brendan, I don’t doubt that you love those kids. I know you do. But fatherhood doesn’t start and finish with five hours every other weekend. Being a parent is about more than McDonald’s Happy Meals and the odd pet hamster.’
‘I know.’ He looks up. ‘But can I outline my defence?’
‘Go on.’
‘I am acutely aware of how surplus to requirements I am around here, Lisa. Believe me, I am. But that’s partly it. When the boys come to stay with me, all they want is to be back home with you. Theytolerateme. Theywantto be with you.’
‘It’s nothing personal,’ I insist. ‘They just want their PlayStations. And their friends.’
‘You’re wrong,’ he says, more firmly than I’d been expecting. ‘I’m sorry, but you are. I know you get all the hassle from Leo, but you also get the love. He adores you, Lisa.’
‘I don’t think so,’ I scoff.
‘No, it’s true,’ he says emphatically. ‘You should hear how he describes you to Melanie. He goes on about how his mum has this amazing TV career, lots of friends and goes running and does DIY in her spare time. She gets a little . . . paranoid about it.’
‘Right.’
‘Look, I’m digressing. This is not about Melanie, it’s about me. And the point I’m making is that it’s hard to have toforcetwo kids to spend time with you when they’d rather be with their mum. You’ve made this their home. My place is not somewhere they want to be.’
‘Maybe you need to do something to make it feel more like home or just spend more time over here supporting them – and yes, I’ll say it, supportingme. It’s not fair that my mother has to pick up all the slack. She doesn’t mind, but it’s not her job, Brendan. It’s yours and mine.’
I don’t spell it out that she might hate him a bit less if he did pick up the reins a little more. That’smight.
He nods, takes a deep breath, then says: ‘All right. This is what’s going to happen. Things are going to change around here. You have my word.’
Brendan’s word has not always been worth much, but for once he looks as if he really means it. And what option do I have but to give him the benefit of the doubt?
‘Those kids do mean the world to me, you know.’ I register a slight quiver in his bottom lip. ‘I’d do anything for them.’
‘Good.’
He takes on a thoughtful, determined expression. ‘Do you think . . . Lisa, this is a big question I know. But . . . do you think we should try again? As a couple, I mean.’
I nearly spit out my tea. ‘Good God, no.’
He pulls back, clearly affronted.
‘Don’t be ridiculous, Brendan,’ I add.
‘All right,steady on,’he huffs.
But after a moment, his piqued expression makes way for a smile.
‘I didn’t mean any offence, but I think we’re past all that, don’t you?’ I add.
He shrugs. ‘Yes, I suppose we are.’
‘And don’t pretend you’re not relieved.’
He chortles and sips his tea. ‘Icouldpotentially look at moving back to this end of Manchester though,’ he suggests. ‘Not necessarily Roebury itself, but somewhere closer.’
God, that would make life so much easier.
‘How would Melanie feel about that?’ I feel obliged to say.
‘I’ll talk to her,’ he says. ‘And in the meantime, whatever happens, I promise things are going to change. I’m going to arrange something special for them next weekend.’
