“I’m sorry it has to be this way,” he said.
“Don’t be. You didn’t create this world. You’re just trying to help us survive it.”
He raised his bottle. “To surviving another day in Rabid Country,” he said, then took a long swig.
“I love you,” I said with my arms wrapped possessively around his chest. I didn’t want to suffocate him, but I needed him to know. “I can’t lose you, Cipher.”
“You won’t, babe. Promise.”
I tried to take comfort in his words. Perhaps it was silly of me, but I wanted us to have a long life together, to continue building our home and taking care of our family, to have a small herd of livestock, maybe even a horse too, and a garden with a fruit orchard. I wanted to make fruit pies and cobblers and experiment with new recipes, see him smile with pleasure as he tried another of my delicious baked goods for the first time. Iwanted to watch the seasons change, year after year, for us to both age into mature men with gray hair and wrinkles. To sit on our porch chairs and talk about the weather.
At the very least, I wanted us to live to see our next birthdays.
“We have to be more careful,” I told him.
“We didn’t think they’d be hunting in daylight,” he said, his voice fainter.
“Well, now we know.”
We lapsed into silence and a few minutes later, Cipher was snoring lightly. I took the half-empty bottle from him and capped it before setting it aside. My butt was starting to fall asleep, and the loose gravel beneath me was going to give me bruises, but I didn’t want to move and disturb him, so I stared up at the stars as they slowly winked to life and thanked all my lucky ones that we’d survived the Rabids yet again.
How many more times would we be this lucky? Wouldn’t we be safer inside a military base with plenty of food and soldiers to help protect us?
But maybe that was just another version of Promised Land, where they sacrificed the weakest among them for the greater good. Like Brother Larry and Jeremiah. Yeah, we were better off on our own. I just hated Cipher putting his life at risk every time we needed supplies. One day our luck was going to run out.
And then what?
I blinkedmy eyes open to find the sky just starting to turn golden, my handsome boyfriend silhouetted by the buttery hue, his black hair crowned with gold as he stood at the edge of thebuilding, looking down. I must have fallen asleep just before dawn–this was why I never got the night shifts–but we had dragged the AC unit over the grate to prevent any Rabids from making it to the roof and thankfully, none had.
I stood up slowly and twisted my shoulders to stretch my back. Everything was stiff and my butt was numb, but at least Cipher had slept some.
“Morning, sunshine,” he said to me with a lopsided grin. “Any ideas on how we get down?”
Fortunately, I’d had most of the night to come up with a solution. I bent over and began untying the laces on my boots.
“I’m not sure your boots will help with this one,” Cipher said, and when I started unbuttoning my pants, he added with a grin, “but I do like where this is going.”
“I’m going to use my jeans as rope to lower you down.”
He squinted, and the frown above his eyes indicated that he had doubts about my plan. “Okay, but what about you? I guess I could try and break your fall,” he said.
“I’ll tie them off to this metal pole and swing down after you.”
“Like Tarzan?” he said.
“Who’s Tarzan?” I asked and he opened his mouth to explain before realizing that I was teasing him.
I peeled off my jeans while Cipher continued to stare. They were slightly damp from the morning chill, but that wouldn’t matter much. I slung them over my shoulder and put my boots back on. They’d been a gift from Cipher when we’d first arrived back in Greenville and had scavenged all the houses in the neighborhood. He said it was important that I have a proper pair of shoes to protect my feet from glass and stray nails. They fit me perfectly.
“Damn, you are fine,” Cipher said. He grabbed hold of me with his one good arm and pulled me in close, kissing me fiercely on the mouth while grabbing my ass and squeezing. His breathstill had the sickly sweet taste of the grape wine, too fresh to be from last night.
“Have you been drinking already?” I asked.
“It’s for the pain.”
Well, I’d rather him get a little tipsy than have to suffer. At the edge of the building, I lay on my stomach and dangled the jeans to see how far down they might reach. Good enough.
“Very clever, Kitten,” Cipher said with a note of admiration.
