“You said before you don’t like rules.”
“No, but I like it when people followmyrules. That way they don’t get hurt.”
My back was tense. It was something Cipher would say, and yet, when Jeremiah said it, it sounded like a threat. I was silent, giving him the opportunity to explain himself but he didn’t. He hadn’t brought a towel with him, so I went over to the stack of clean ones in the corner of the room and grabbed one for him so that he could use it to cover himself. I kept my eyes lowered so that all I could see were his broad feet and the tan lines on his thick, hairy calves where his socks must have ended. I handed it over, but he refused to take it, until I was forced to shift my gaze upward.
His dick was hard and he was not-so-subtly stroking himself while staring at me with his mouth open and a glazed expression on his face. Lust, I recognized it for what it was. The other men had either dressed and left or were in the showers, so there was no one else to witness what was going on. I shoved the towel at him and backed away, stumbling over a bench in my haste to retreat. He laughed as I scrambled to my feet.
“Don’t leave so soon, Joshua. We’re just getting to know each other. I can’t help it that it’s been awhile. Am I making you nervous?”
“Yes.” I focused my attention on the damp tiled floor while trying to catch my breath. My hand reached for the inhaler tucked in my pocket. I really didn’t want to have an asthma attack right then.
“Don’t you ever rub one out?” he asked like it was a perfectly normal thing to do.
“Not in front of people I don’t know.”
“In front of your boyfriend?” My eyes flashed up to see him smiling. Was this a joke to him? A prank? He licked his lips and said slowly, “Yeah, I bet you like to give him a show. You like to tease him, Joshua?”
“I have to get back to work,” I said, trembling with fear and nausea.
“That’s too bad. I thought we were having fun.”
I shook my head, too stunned to speak. Why would he think I was having fun? What was wrong with this guy?
Jeremiah shrugged as if he couldn’t care less and turned towards the showers, glancing back to see me rooted in place because I refused to go any farther. “Aren’t you coming?” he asked.
“No.”
He laughed. He was laughing at me. “Suit yourself. I do like a challenge.”
His eyes raked over me again. I turned away, took a hit from my inhaler, and got out of there as fast as I could, unable to shake the crawl of his eyes across my skin or the sound of his mocking laughter ringing in my ears.
This was a game to him. He was tormenting me. But why? Boredom? Cruelty? My friend Lucas from back home had acted like a bully at times, but this was different. Jeremiah seemed more than just mean. He seemed dangerous.
Instead of returning to the birthing center, I hurried back to our house, the place I felt most safe. I understood why Cipher had wanted locks on our doors, and I wished we had them now.
One thing I knew for certain, I never wanted to see that man again.
THIRTEEN
CIPHER
My conscience wouldn’t letme rest over missing that shot at the tiger. If someone from the Fellowship got hurt because of my inability to act, I’d never forgive myself.
What if Kitten got hurt?
“There’s something I need to tell you,” I said to Larry once I’d arrived at the armory for our daily check-in. He motioned to two chairs, and rather than debate with myself any longer, I came right out with it. “I don’t think I’m the best person for this job.”
“Interesting assessment,” he said with a lowered brow. “Why is that?”
“Because the other night, when I took that shot at the tiger and missed, I’m not sure it was an accident.”
“You’re telling me you missed on purpose?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.”
He scrutinized me closely. “Why would you do that, kid?”
“Didn’t seem fair to kill it. We had a connection, or so it seemed. It’s hard to explain. Maybe I let Kitten get in my head about it too.”
