Afew days later when we are back at the villa, Giovanni brings me a letter, one written by Valentin toward the end of his life and given to Gio after the reading of my brother’s will. This letter and the painting are all that Giovanni wanted of my brother’s estate. Now, he points to my brother’s shaky cursive and says, “Normally his penmanship was very neat, but you can see here the tremor of his hand. It must have been hard for him to write this. He saved it for me, so that I might have some comfort after he…” He glances up at me with his big, sad eyes. “After he went away.”
The letter is written in English, so Giovanni translates it for me.“…and all that I ask of you, Giovanni, is that you demonstrate the virtues I taught you in a way that honors me, and if you do choose Silvio as your Dominant, then love him with your whole heart and devote yourself to him as you would your Master. Until we meet again, my beloved golden boy...”
Giovanni sniffles and wipes at his eyes. He’s already crawled into my lap for this reading, so it’s easy to comfort him as we are. He’s very much like a little boy sometimes, needing cuddles and affection and to be told that he is good.
“Thank you for sharing that with me, Gio. Your Master loved you very much. He told me many, many times how precious you were to him.”
He nods and folds the paper, careful not to smudge the ink with his tears. “I thought you might like to know why this is hard for me, Sir, to shift my allegiance. I love you and I want to submit to you. It’s just that, I don’t know how to be your submissive. Because I’m so used to serving Master.”
We are each clinging to what we know. For myself, trying to mimic my brother’s way of dominating Gio will only set us both up to fail. If we are to truly move on, we must leave the past behind and forge something new.
“Tell me your virtues,” I say, even though they are engraved in my psyche already.
“Humility, patience, subservience, and gratitude,” he recites.
“But these are yourMaster’svirtues for you, are they not?”
“Yes?”
“These are notmyvirtues, Giovanni. This is clearly the problem. How can you serve me as my submissive if you are following your Master’s rules?”
He juts out his lower lip, thinking on this revelation, and I recall the passages he’d shown me about the many types of love the Greeks have for each other. That was how he was finally able to express his feelings toward me, by writing his thoughts down in a letter, with annotations, my little scholar.
At last, his dewy-eyed gaze lifts to meet mine. “How might I be virtuous for my Sir?”
“Don’t worry, beautiful baby, Sir has some ideas.”
We’rein the playroom now, and I am binding one of Gio’s lovely pink heels in an ankle tie that resembles the crisscrossing straps of a Roman sandal, an observation he made with a quiet sort of awe. We have come to this scene to discuss the virtues I have in mind—three in all. Giovanni has had time to reflect and will share his virtues for me as well. He was hesitant at first to make such a determination, but I insisted.
“I would like my submissive to be adventurous,” I tell him, admiring the golden glow of skin that peeks between the gaps in my rope.
“Adventurous,” Giovanni repeats as if sounding out the word. “What does that mean to you, Sir?”
“Well, you are already first mate on my magnificentEvelina, and I now wish to suspend you with my rope.” I nod to the rigging above us. “This requires an adventurous spirit and a willingness to try new things, which I believe you have already.”
Giovanni wiggles his toes. “Would Sir like to experiment with his boy sexually?”
“Oh yes. I would like to try many, many new things with you, but this virtue is not only for the bedroom, Giovanni, it is for life.”
“Sir would like his submissive to take more risks?” he asks, tentative this time, probably recalling all the times I’ve encouraged him to make friends and pursue his passions.
“With my help, princess. Like when we’re in a scene. I’ll never leave you bound and alone but stay with you the entire time to monitor your comfort and make sure you’re enjoying the experience. And I wouldn’t ask you to take risks without my being there to support you.”
“But what if I fail?”
“Failure is a fact of life and how we learn. Your Master taught me that. Besides, your willingness to try new things is more important to me than whether or not you succeed.”
I tell him a story of my maiden voyage on my first sailboat, how I couldn’t catch the wind and ran out of fuel and had to be towed back to the marina by the Corps of the Port Captaincies, which was terribly embarrassing. “But I didn’t give up after that first attempt and look at me now.”
“A seasoned sailor,” he says with a smile. “I can be adventurous for you, Sir, as long as there is a safe harbor for me to return to.”
“I promise to always provide you that. Now, up on your feet.” He rises to stand with his legs shoulder-width apart, arms akimbo so that I may bind his slim hips and torso. My rope winds around his smooth thighs and taut stomach like a chastity belt, framing his groin and the plump fruits dangling there. “Give me a kiss, pretty baby.” I pause tying him up to brush his softly parted lips with my own.
“Mmmm…” he murmurs, wrapping his arms around my neck and pulling me in for more because my kisses are a delicious treat. “What else would you ask of your boy, Sir?”
“You know that I love your mouth, princess, for so many reasons. Your Master didn’t like backtalk from hisschiavo, and that was fine for him because he was a very strict man, but your Sir likes a little sass.”
“You want a brat?” he asks, nudging my foot with one toe.
