I understood well the temptation to forgo spiritual growth in order to pursue earthly pleasures. It was the Adam in me.
“I love him,” I said to Azrael, knowing it was unlikely to sway him. But the words were honest and true. I would give up anything for you—my life, my power, my body. I would slaughter demon or mortal to keep you safe. Surely that must mean something.
“Your sentiment has corrupted you.”
I shook my head vehemently, still on my knees before him. If I’d acted dishonorably, it was only done to protect you.
“He makes me better.” It was the closest I’d ever come to challenging Azrael’s righteous word.
“He’s not strong enough to withstand this union.” Azrael’s posture shifted as he drew himself up, hardening himself to our plight.
“He’s young. He only needs a little more time and guidance.”
“You sound like the Grigori, begging for our blessing to copulate with humans.”
The Grigori weren’t given their blessing, and they’d done it anyway. They’d disobeyed, the gravest of offenses. I was the result of one of those unions.
“I only ask that you save his soul. If I have to abandon him, I will. He isn’t beyond redemption. It’s my fault he was brought into this desperate situation. He doesn’t deserve to be thrust into the hands of a demon like my mother and tormented for an eternity.”
Azrael fell silent, and I gazed upon you as he consulted the Potestas. Your eyelids fluttered, and your chest rose and fell with every breath. Countless nights I’d watched over you just like this, both in a body and as a spirit, content in the knowledge you were alive and well. That was all I ever wanted. I could let you go. It would be difficult, but I would follow through if it meant saving you.
“We are prepared to offer his soul redemption, but you must offer us a sacrifice.”
“Yes,” I said enthusiastically. “Anything.”
There was a long pause, and then Azrael issued his command.
“You must reap your lover’s body and deliver his soul to me.”
My heart stumbled and blood pounded in my ears. My entire body stiffened with dread. I could not have heard him correctly.
“Reap him?” I asked shakily.
“If his eternal soul is so precious, and your love as true as you claim, then sacrifice his body to us, and we will keep watch over his spirit until you can be reunited again.”
“That could take years.” Decades, centuries even, before your soul was ready to be reborn.
“Love is patient,” Azrael said with an edge of condescension.
“This isn’t fair to him. His life has only just begun.” There were so many places you’d yet to visit, dances you’d not yet performed, lessons you still needed to learn. Your body was extraordinary in every way. Your body… I loved your body.
“There must be another way.” I extended my arms in supplication and bowed deeply, hiding my bared teeth. “I will do anything.Anything. My lord, please, do not ask this of me.”
“Your lover made a pact with the Grigori, a royal demoness with a thirst for vengeance. This act is not easily undone.”
“She manipulated him. Shecoercedhim. I came to you. Ifoughtfor you.”
“Our judgment is final,” Azrael said calmly. “Deliver his soul to me by sunrise tomorrow or it shall be eternally damned. We will establish your penance once the sacrifice has been made.”
Without another word to me, I watched through a blur of angry tears as he turned on his heels and left. This was Azrael at his cruelest and most unforgiving. Damn the gods and their impossible laws. Curse Lena and her abominable scheming.
I crawled into bed and drew your sleeping form into my arms. I’d sworn to protect you, and I’d failed, just as I’d failed Lior so long ago. There was no redemption to be had for me.
I failed you, Orlando.
46
Orlando
