“I mean, in all honesty,” Liam continued. “We couldn’t have chosen worse romantic partners.”
“How’s that?” Marquis asked, offended.
“Our relationships are like this party. Ephemeral. Hedonistic. Not meant to last.”
“So, you keep saying.” This came from Liam’s man. We were all startled by his contribution, as he’d been mostly silent up until that point. He sat on a loveseat with one arm draped casually around Liam. His posture had the air of self-possession, and there was an arrogant languor about him that I attributed to jocks and the very wealthy.
“How is any of this sustainable?” Liam demanded, working himself into a tizzy. “Can you really see yourselves together a year from now? Or even at the end of this summer?”
“Yes,” I said forcefully. I couldn’t see myself without him.
“You’re the most delusional of us all, Michael,” Liam insisted. “You have neither the resources nor the constitution to maintain your relationship.”
“I’m not with Michael for his money,” Arden said, his tone no longer light.
“Obviously,” Liam said. “He can’t afford you. So, whyareyou with him?”
“Because I…” Arden halted as if struck by some realization. I desperately wanted to know the conclusion, but Liam didn’t give him the opportunity.
“I’ll tell you why. Michael’s a curiosity for you. A lark. Someone clever to try out your thwarted Ivy League education, to dip your toes in what might have been had you pursued an honest living. And once you’ve tired of him, you’ll move on, and Michael will be just another notch on your bedpost. You can brag to your rich lovers that you once fucked a bestselling author as if it’s some great achievement on your part. I doubt you even—”
“That’s enough,” I said sharply and stood in front of Liam as though I could block Arden physically from his vitriol.
Liam swallowed his next words and only a moment later, was swept up by his strongman who lifted Liam easily into his arms and removed him from our presence, shutting the door behind him like a gallant knight. None of us made a move to go after them. I stood there with my back to Arden through a long, dreadful silence—even Franco was at a loss for words—until Arden said, quietly, “Is that what you think of me, Michael?”
I swallowed, eyes stinging, and wondered if Liam had been able to divine my fears through his intuition alone. Or if there was something about Arden that I’d blinded myself to all along. Was I as delusional as Liam had claimed? Instead of addressing Liam’s accusations directly, I took the coward’s way out.
“I’m drunk, Arden, and it’s late. Can we save it for tomorrow?”
“Why not?” he said, always so eager to oblige. But there was something in his tone—pain or defeat. He stood, still naked, and strolled out to the balcony, taking our cigarettes with him.
“You should go to him,” Marquis said. Franco nodded.
I took a few deep breaths and joined Arden where he leaned with his forearms on the stone balustrade, gazing at the sleeping city below. The sky was a smoggy lavender hue, and the streets were relatively quiet in the hours just before dawn. I was sobering rapidly, a mixed bag. Arden offered me his lit cigarette, and I took it.
“I’m sorry for Liam’s behavior,” I said. “Again. And I’m sorry that I let it get that far. It all escalated so quickly.” I should have silenced Liam’s abuse at the outset.
“I understand how I might appear to your friends, like some heartless gold digger, but I hope you don’t think of me that way.”
“I don’t. Not at all. What I feel for you is very real and very scary.”
“I have those feelings too.”
“And the idea of losing you terrifies me,” I said.
Arden dragged one hand through his glossy waves, his fingers getting tangled in the mess. “I’m in a tough spot, Michael. I have been for a while. And even then…”
“I could help you, Arden. You only need to ask.”
“If you did, then it would prove everything Liam said about me. This is the only way to keep our relationship honest.”
“I don’t like you fucking other men.”
There, I’d said it. What a relief.
“I know.”
“I also don’t like that you enjoy it.”
