I take a moment to reflect on the gravity of what we’re doing. Straight couples don’t have to go through near as much bullshit to be together. Make great proclamations about their sexuality or worry about which of their family members are going to disown them, or in my case, cut off my mythical trust fund.West Side Story, my ass—what bliss.
“Hey, guess who else is gay?” I say to Chris.
“Who?”
“Uncle Theo.”
“Cocksucker Uncle Theo?”
“Yup.”
“Wow.”
“I know. He totally has a crush on one of the nurses at the home.”
“Really? Is that how you found out he was gay?”
“Yeah, and he more or less told me after I came out to him. It’s this whole secret society, Chris.”
“Apparently.”
“The cool club.”
“That might be overselling it.”
I chuckle. “Maybe so.”
The lady behind the counter calls me up then, and Chris tosses me his keys. “Good luck, Killer.”
I pull Chris’s car around back, and an older guy gets in and introduces himself. We go through the three-point turn and parking between the orange cones. Then we go out to the road, and he tells me to stop, and I do so without making it too abrupt. I make a few turns with signals and handle some traffic lights. I merge and adhere to right-of-way and do everything I think I’m supposed to. When the car is safely parked back at the DMV, I ask the guy how I did.
“You did great,” he says with more enthusiasm than anyone working inside has shown me. “Remember, no drinking, no drugs, and no texting.”
“Yes, sir.”
Driver’s test: slayed.
The smile on my face is huge when they take my picture. I come back out to Chris, show him my new license with the plastic still warm from the machine, and ask him if he thinks my smile is too eager.
“What?” he says like I’m crazy.
“Does it look like I’m trying too hard?”
“To do what?”
“I don’t know. Do I look stupid?”
“No, Theo, you look happy.” Then, in front of everyone in the DMV, he hooks his arm around my neck and plants a big fat kiss on my cheek.
No one at the DMV is impressed. Except, of course, for me.
And I get to drive us home.
WE TAKEthe long way home, along the intercoastal with the windows down and the wind in our hair. I’m driving legally at last. The moment I’ve been dreaming about for so long is finally realized and even better because Chris is here with me.My boyfriend.I say it in my head a few times. It sounds so strange, but I love it.
Chris is smiling and humming to himself. I ask him what he’s thinking about, and he glances over like I caught him up to no good.
“Nothing.” He shakes his head like he’s embarrassed.
