“It’s cool,” he said, interrupting my self-examination. “It’s just. It’s different here, from Alabama.”
He had a Southern drawl, which became more apparent when he said “Alabama.”
“Why’d you come here?” I asked.
He raised his chin defiantly. “I’m not welcome here?” His shoulders tensed. I didn’t want him to feel threatened. I should just quit talking. I was fucking up left and right.
“That’s not what I meant.” I shook my head, exasperated. “You smoke?” I reached into Melissa’s apron where I knew she kept a spare pack of cigarettes.
“Yeah,” he drawled, wiping his hands on his apron. “Yeah, let’s do that.”
We went outside. While we smoked he told me he’d hopped a Greyhound bus not even two weeks before. He came to Miami with nothing but the shirt on his back. Fang—Andre called him Roger—had seen him at the shelter when he was delivering leftovers from the restaurant.
“He asked me if I could wash dishes,” Andre said. “I figured I could do a lot worse.”
“Why’d you come to Miami, of all places?”
He smiled. “I heard this is where all the gays are.”
I laughed out loud, then choked on smoke. After months of not smoking, my lungs were giving me a hard time. “You don’t have gays in Alabama?”
Andre shook his head emphatically. “None that make it known.”
“Is it dangerous?”
He shrugged. “Where I’m from, the only thing worse than being black is being gay.”
God, that sucked. I mean, I knew intolerance was everywhere and hate crimes too, but I’d grown up in Miami where you’d get up in arms if someone threw you a dirty look. But I didn’t worry about mobs of homophobes or racists hunting me down. I didn’t have to hide who I was or worry about my safety simply because I preferred boys.
“People are so fucking stupid,” I said.
He grunted. “I heard that.”
“What about your parents?” Despite him saying he was eighteen, I put him closer to sixteen.
“You really want to get all up in my business, don’t you, Martin?” He shook his head and took a long drag from his cigarette. He held it so that it was mostly hidden in his hand, cupped like you would a match to keep the flame from going out. There was something so furtive about the way he smoked, as if he might get caught at any moment.
“Yeah, I do,” I admitted.
“You don’t have to worry about my parents.” He leveled his gaze at me, daring me to say more, making me wonder what he thought I was thinking when I asked him. He put out the cigarette and flicked it into the dumpster. The kid was a riddle.
I followed him back inside, and we worked in shifts. He’d scrape the plates and spray them down with hot water. I’d wash and load them into the sterilizer. He didn’t have any sense of urgency, which made me worry that he was not well suited for restaurant life. I asked him what kind of music he liked, and he gave me the names of a few rappers. I created a station and played it on the kitchen speakers. The music and the task let us both relax. I worried I was making a complete fool out of myself, or creeping him out, but I simply wanted to be near him. I wanted nothing from him.
That’s a lie. I wanted everything.
Hector came in around midnight and eyed the both of us with suspicion.
“You about done here?” he asked. Time was money with Hector. I knew without a doubt the thought running through his mind was that I’d better not expect to get paid hourly for what I was doing. I wanted to tell him that he could keep that extra $5.03. Cheap bastard.
“Five more minutes, sir,” Andre said. His manners were genuine. Must be a Southern thing.
Hector glanced down at his fancy watch. “We got to speed it up here, kid. Dishes shouldn’t take this long.”
“Yes, sir,” Andre said. I couldn’t tell if he was worried about keeping his job or not. If employment was important to him or if it was just something he fell into.
After the dishes were stacked, our aprons hung up, and another cigarette smoked, I asked him how he was getting home.
“That your car?” He glanced furtively at my Sebring convertible, an older model. Nothing too fancy or expensive, but it had a certain class that I appreciated. And the ability to take the top down made it easy to transport canvases.
