“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I grew up thinking that hockey was the most important thing in my life and that a relationship, or distraction of any kind, would ruin that.” He grabs my face between his hands. “But if anything, you make me better. And the thought of knowing you’re in my corner supporting me for all the hockey milestones I’ll achieve makes them that much more special.”
He keeps talking, but I don’t hear anything else. We’ve talked about him winning the championship game, but he saidmilestones,as in multiple. He’s talking like there’s no end in sight for us, and I like it.
I like the idea of this not just being a fling that ends when the project is over… and that he’s the one taking that step. That he sees the future for us that I’ve been seeing since our first date… maybe even before then.
“I love you.”
My eyes go wide, and I can’t tell if the heavy breathing I hear is mine or his. I think it’s his, though, because I can’t breathe. I can’t speak. My mouth is dry, and no words can find their escape. His eyes match mine, almost as if he’s not sure what was just said.
But I know.
I just told Declan Sanderson I love him.
And I didn’t mean to.
Maybe I can backtrack. Or maybe I’m lucky, and he didn’t even hear what I said. But I can tell he heard it. His eyes no longer seem wide with confusion but some kind of fear I can’t read.
“What?” His voice cracks.
I don’t think that’s a good sign.
“Well, uh—”
There’s no backtracking. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Come on, Ember, think of something good. For heaven's sake, we’ve only been official for a little over a month. Not that there’s ever a right time to say I love you, I guess. People just say it when they feel it.
But by the look in his eyes, he’s not feeling it. My eyes leave him, and I try to focus anywhere but his face. And suddenly, the warmth that was once there isn’t, and that’s when I realize he’s readjusted himself on the couch.
There’s a whole cushion between us.
“I—” I start to stand up as the front door opens.
I have no idea who’d be getting in at this hour but thank god for them because this needs to end.
“I didn’t expect anyone to be up.” Brooks slips off his shoes by the front door and heads toward us.
“Hey, man,” Declan begins. So, he didn’t lose his voice… he just didn’t know what to say tome. “I assumed you were staying at Liv’s.”
“I was going to, but she said I’m too noisy in the morning when I’m getting ready for a game and that I’d wake her up.”
“Ah,” Declan says.
“What are you guys up to?” he wonders, leaning against the stair railing.
“Nothing, I was just leaving,” I reply, and I can feel Declan’s stare burning holes in my back, but I don’t turn to look at him. “I’ll see you guys, umm—”
“Tomorrow?” Brooks adds, and I hold back a sigh.
“Right.”Great. “Tomorrow.”
I rush to the front door, not bothering to glance at Declan on the way out. I wonder if Brooks thinks it’s weird that we didn’t say goodbye to each other or if he just thinks we did it before he got home.
I feel kind of guilty for just leaving my dirty dish, but I think it would’ve been weirder for both of us if I had stuck aroundin silenceto do my dishes.
I swing the door closed behind me, but it doesn’t close, it stops mid-way, and I feel my heart jump in my chest. But as I inch closer and closer to my car, he doesn’t say anything.
He doesn’t do what I hope. Instead, he stands in the doorway and watches me go—
