This is what normal looks like.
This is what I don’t get to have.
I pull out my phone and snap a picture—coffee, plate, sunlight catching the edge of the table—and send it to Cal before I can think too hard about it.
Reva
See. I’m doing normal girl, touristy stuff.
The response comes almost immediately.
Cal
I am not amused. You need to get your ass home. What the hell were you thinking, quitting your job out of the blue like that? You’re going to lose your apartment.
My jaw tightens.
Notare you safe.Notare you okay.
Like I didn’t leave for a reason. I purse my lips, then tap out a response.
Reva
Sublet it for me.
Threedots appear. Disappear. Reappear.
Cal
Reva.
I roll my eyes, even though he can’t see me.
Reva
Or break the lease. Do what you have to do. I’m not coming back yet.
My phone rings, and I stare at it for a second.
I let it ring. Let it keep ringing. Then I silence it.
I can’t explain this to him. He wouldn’t understand.Or worse—he would, and he’d try to stop me anyway. I drain the rest of my coffee in one swallow, ignoring the way it burns on the way down, and stand.
Reva
Gotta go.
I send it before I can second-guess myself, then shove my phone back in my pocket and head out.
My morning walk wasted just enough time for Noir to be opening. From down the sidewalk, I catch a glimpse of Shiloh setting a placard out. He squints against the sun, hair bright, sees me coming, and shakes his head before disappearing inside.
I walk faster, my fingers moving to pop the rubber bands on my opposite wrist. If they think I’m going to walk away because one man told me no, they don’t know me at all.
I didn’t come this far to get turned away. I push through the door, willing my anger into discipline.
Shiloh hasn’t been able to help me, not without going out of his way to demand an exception, which apparently is something he doesn’t do often if ever.
Our night together clearly didn’t mean enough for him to go out of his way for me, then—an irritating little factoid I tuck away for later.
