Shaking my head, I let out a sigh. “I’m not stupid. I have always known where I stood with her, but she’s family, so what can I do?”
“Throw her in front of a moving bus? Give her crabs? Maybe at the very least force her to step on some Legos.”
“I think that’s fair.” An easy chuckle slips free. “Anyway, Kirill and I just…we’re not compatible. That’s all. It’s whatever, you know?”
“Sure…” Mandy drags the word out like she’s humoring me. “Whatever you say.”
I pretend not to hear the way she clearly doesn’t believe a single syllable and go wipe down a spot on the counter that’s already clean. Anything to keep my hands moving while she disappears into the kitchen to grab orders.
I know I’m right. Kirill and I are a no-go.
To prove it, my brain starts putting together a list of all the reasons we’d never work, like I can talk myself out of the way he gazes at me. The way my body reacts when he’s too close. The way it felt when his hand didn’t let mine go. I do it anyway, because pretending we don’t work is easier than sitting with how much it hurts that we might.
He doesn’t know me. I’m a murderer with a criminal past. Once he finds out, he’s not going to want me anywhere near Lev.
I’m a mom. What if he doesn’t even want more kids?
He’s older, which is more of a downside for him than me. I’d take him at any age. Wait, no… Maybe I shouldn’t add this to my list.
I have nothing to offer. I don’t have money or an education. I would suck up everything he has, and who the hell wants that for a girlfriend?
I’m sure there are plenty more reasons, but I can’t think of any right now.
I let out a sigh, grab the coffee carafe, and start toward the dining room to hit a few tables when I feel someone step up behind me. I go still, the back of my neck erupting in goose bumps as warm, heavy breaths fan over my skin, making every nerve in my body spike with familiar fear.
I don’t know why I don’t turn around. Maybe my intuition already knows. Maybe it’s trying to protect me.
But it’s already too late.
“Hello, Eden. It’s been a long time.”
Eli.
Oh, God. Nonono…
The sound of my name in his mouth hits like a blow. The carafe slips from my fingers, hot coffee splashing over my legs. The burn is sharp, vicious, but it barely registers over the roar in my ears.
“Oh my God! Are you okay?” Mandy and another waitress rush in on either side of me, reaching for the carafe and my arms, while I stay rooted to the spot.
Panic clamps down so hard I can’t move. My breaths turn jagged, my body folding in on itself because the life I’ve been running from has finally caught up to me.
I force myself to turn, to face him, to prove I’m not losing my mind. But when I do, he’s gone. Like he was never there at all.
