I breathe heavily, because the adrenaline from the race is still rushing hot through my veins and I know exactly what he means. I was practically flying, my knee just inches above the ground as I leaned into the curves. Today, there was no limit for me. The sounds of the engine and the wind grew louder and more intense as the landscape blurred past me in a whirlwind.
I needed this euphoria and thrill, the tension of not knowing if the next curve would throw me off while fighting against gravity. That absolute focus and sharpened senses make me feel alive and free.
Damn, I needed this.
Since I’ve already taken off my helmet, Ced can see exactly what’s going on because he knows me way too well, but I still brush it off.
“Nothing. I just had too much energy.”
Bullshit.
And that’s exactly what the look in his eyes tells me, but I don’t want to talk about how I’ve been walking around with a constant hard-on for four days. How the object of my desire has been avoiding me the entire time, practically vanished into thin air. How I’m obsessed with the thought of touching Amelia again. Obsessed with feeling her.
How she gets under my skin, damn it.
When I saw her at Phil’s grave, so desperate, so full of pain, her knuckles scraped raw, my protective instinct kicked into full gear.
Amelia Perlington is like a trapped animal. She’s suffering, in so many different ways that it physically hurts to watch. Touching her, feeling her, hurt. And at the same time, I’ve never felt anything better. Never felt freer and more understood than there, at that grave.
“When you’re done serving me bullshit, will you finally tell me what’s really going on? It’s enough that one of my best friends clearly booked a one-way ticket to hell and keeps shutting himself off. And we have no damn clue why. Another one like that would be too much, even for my cold soul,” he says sarcastically, and I rub my face, annoyed.
“You’re not going to quit, are you?” I ask cautiously, even though I already know the answer.
“Nope.” He takes off his helmet and shakes his head, and I sigh.
“Amelia’s gone. I… well… fuck. Maybe I fouled around with her at my brother’s grave. Maybe I’m a little obsessed with her now and can’t get her out of my head. Maybe she just left me standing there afterwards. And maybe my ego doesn’t handle that very well.”
I’ve never been a coward, and I have to admit her reaction hit me hard. It pissed me off. In many ways, I felt like dirt.
Cedric’s eyebrows raise a bit with each word, and his lips twitch suspiciously.
“Well, well. So the little prince has developed a bit of an obsession with Miss ‘I Am So Prude’—your words, not mine. Who would’ve thought?” he taunts dryly and gets flipped off by me in return.
“What? You’re not seriously pissed because exactly what I predicted happened? You really hold it against her? You saw her. You saw how much she’s suffering. You can’t really be mad at her for doing exactly what you do—trying to escape the situation.” Cedric runs his hands through his hair and looks at me with a serious but curious expression, and I snort briefly.
“No. No, I’m not mad at her, even though it hit me hard at first. I felt like the biggest loser, and she looked so hurt, so confused. But I get it. Only I can’t tell her that, because she’s hiding. I swear, even I’m not as good at disappearing as that woman,” I say, frustrated, and Ced laughs.
“To think I get to witness this moment. Prince Nicolas of Harlington, desperate over a woman. You’re so screwed, man.” He pats me on the shoulder, and I have to hold back from punching him.
Asshole.
“But back to your problem. Maybe you should think about talking to her. Getting to know her. Because obviously, there’s more to her than you ever suspected. Not to mention that she’s stunning and totally knocks your socks off.”
“Very clever, you genius—and what do you think I’ve been trying for the past four days? It’s not like I’m running around for fun looking for her,” I growl resignedly, but we are interrupted by the others rushing over.
“Yo, Prince, that was a crazy race, what was up with you today?”
“You are kind of sick, you know that?”
“Dude, that was wild. I haven’t seen you ride like that in a while.”
And it goes on.
Yeah, I rode like a maniac today, probably pushed past my own limit, but now I feel better.
I accept their congratulations with half an ear, my attention already drifting. Out of the corner of my eye, I spot Sarah approaching. Instinctively, I reach for my helmet, just as Cedric’s and my phones buzz at the same time.
Damien is in trouble. Heading to the Royals Club. Hurry up.
