I was lucky he didn't break my nose that night. I walked away, needing a few stitches on my forehead, and I didn't have a concussion. In his eyes, that meant that my tears were an overreaction and that what he did to me wasn't as bad as I made it out to be. In his eyes, he could do no wrong.
“She wrote it all down, everything you ever did. Every nasty thing you ever said. Every threat you ever made. She was scared for her life, scared that no one would hear her or see her because of the walls you built up around her, secluding her from the rest of the world.”
Picking up the journal from the tray, I look it over, flipping it around in my hands. My eyes flicker to Knox, gauging his reaction to me holding the journal. He gives me a nod, urging me to continue. I open the front page and let out a gasp at the name scribbled on the inside of the front cover. Ivy Mason. Dropping the journal on the tray, I take several steps back. A choked sob is stuck in my throat, and my world begins spinning on its axis.How does he have this journal? Who is he to Ivy? What does this have to do with Jason?
For the first time tonight, I realize what a fool I’ve been to trust a stranger. To let my guard down and find comfort in his kind words and promises of protection. I don’t even know this man. My fear is growing with each second I waste standing here in this room.
I run out of the room, sprinting up the stairs, taking them two at a time, aiming straight for the changing lounge. I gather mybelongings and decide to make a run for it, when I turn around and stop dead in my tracks. Knox stands before me. It’s just him and I in this empty room, and I begin to tremble. He approaches me with raised hands, a sign that he means me no harm.
“Candy, you don’t need to be afraid of me. I can explain.” I take slow steps backwards, putting distance between us. He stalks forward slowly, matching my pace.
“You knew him, and you didn’t say anything.”
He nods, “You knew Ivy?” I ask, and again he nods.
“Did you know about me?” He purses his lips and drags his hands down his face.
“I knew about you. I knew you were his girlfriend, but I never thought you’d end up in this mess.” he waves his hands around.
“How do you know her?”
Sighing, he closes the gap between us, not deterred by my backing away.
“I need you to trust me, Candace. Can you do that? Can you just… trust that I won’t hurt you?”
“How can I trust you when you’re a stranger to me who clearly knows more about my life than you led on.”
“I wouldn’t say I’m a stranger anymore, Sweetness. I was just tickling the inside of your cunt was I not?”
I scowl at him, and my eyes narrow into slits. “People have one-night stands and hook-ups all the time. It doesn’t mean we know each other."
We stand in silence for a moment, in a stare down, neither one of us willing to budge. Finally, he relents, exhaling a breath, and gesturing to the couch nearby.
I take a seat on the opposite end of Knox, wanting to keep as much space between us as possible.
He clasps his hands together and leans forward on his knees, gearing up to speak words that seem too heavy for his heart. “Ivy was my half-sister.”
My mouth drops open, and I feel all of the blood drain from my face. His half-sister? The pain in his expression is one who knows loss all too well.
“Ivy and I shared the same mother. We didn’t have the same father. She was my only sibling. She was kind and compassionate, and she gave too many chances to those who had burned her. Jason ruined her. Tore her down and made her feel like she was nothing. He broke her spirit and drained her very soul from existence. This journal…” He pulls the journal out from his back pocket. “Is the only proof I have that it was Jason who pushed her to end her life.” He skims through the pages, letting his grief slip through his tough exterior.
“These pages are littered with her pain and suffering. The lost words of a woman who will never have the chance to heal from her mistreatment. We never met Jason when they were together. Ivy kept her dating life a secret. It was a shock when my mother and I found this journal while cleaning out her apartment after she died. He beat her senseless. Isolated her from her friends and stole any hope she had of a bright future. He made her believe she was the cause of every problem he ever had.”
He runs his hand through his hair and peers up from the ground, meeting my eyes.
“So, I found him and watched him. Night and day. Got to know his life, his friends, his family…you. I vowed to myself that one day I would seek justice and restitution for my sister. That I’d rid that piece of shit from this planet so he can never hurt anyone the way he hurt her.”
I don’t say anything. The thoughts that are swirling in my mind are chaotic, and a mixture of emotions for a girl I never knew overwhelms me. Jason used to make comments about her. He would say she was crazy and make it seem like he was the victim of her accusations and foul moods. If a friend brought upher name, he would act like he was a survivor of the abuse he endured.
The contents of my stomach roil at the thought of him pushing Ivy to the brink of suicide. I know how she must have felt. How Jason’s words could cut so deep, it feels like an open wound bleeding out with no way to stop it.
How many times have I thought,If I weren’t here anymore, maybe that would make his life easier. If I just close my eyes and never wake up again, would he even miss me?Everything was always my fault. I was the cause of all of his anger and everything bad that ever happened to him.
Ivy felt she wasn’t good enough. She took matters into her own hands when she didn’t have anyone there to tell her that she wasn’t the problem. My heart shatters for the man sitting across from me. I reach out and place a hand over his.
“I’m so sorry.” My voice is barely a whisper. How do you comfort someone who has felt a loss of such magnitude?
“You don’t have anything to be sorry for, Sweetness. But Jason? He’s about to pay for his transgressions.”
