She nods again, to appease me. Her lips pressed together to keep her tears quiet.
Her head is bowed down when I’m about to leave, and that is what finally gets me.
I smoothly erase the space between us and tilt her chin up. Forgetting about her being naked, I look deep into her eyes.
“Learn to fight, Leilani. That’s all I can say. That’s all life really is. Neither of us knows the future. Neither of us can stop it. We have to bravely face it. That’s it.”
I tilt my eyes to her mouth as she attempts to nod her head again, and I stifle my impulse to touch her lips.
It wouldn’t do us any good.
I tear my touch away and almost make a step back when she winds her arms around my neck and presses her lithe body into mine, her lips against my shirt, staining it with tears, and thenshe pushes up on her toes, crawls as close as she can to my ear, and makes me listen with my head tilted down.
“I have no one, Callum. No one. And they just sentenced me to death.”
She pulls away a little to check my eyes and softly nods a couple of times for emphasis before I feel like there’s nothing else to say, and all I do is break away from her with a finality that’s hard to bear.
19
LEILANI
The blue dresslooks like it's on backward, with its round neckline, a loose fit, and a length that makes it look like a hospital robe.
It looks horrible on me, and I don’t even remember having it in my closet. Nona must’ve had it stashed away from days like these when I’ve got my ass handed to me.
What a horrific experience it has been.
The alcohol has vanished from my system, taking away with it the soothing numbness, and leaving me with strange emotions that bite into me like shards of glass.
I wanted this man so much, and what did I get?
An icy-cold, heartless man who didn’t even blink when I shed my clothes for him.
Is he made of stone? Steel? A slab of concrete?
I hated seeing him so close to me. A hair away from me. Torn. Pondering, Teetering on the edge.
And yet, he pushed me away with his frosted words and sentenced me to spending the rest of my life in hell.
Having zero power over him has left me broken in more ways than I can describe.
What brought him to me then?
Is he that moral of a man? Is he my grandfather’s secret tool? Is he doing them a favor and expecting something in return?
Was he that annoyed that I seduced Paxton Maclean, and also worried that it might reflect negatively on him?
Is he all about business, not making mistakes, and throwing anyone under the bus if they can’t serve a purpose in his life?
My heart cries a little.
It’s not like I’ve never experienced disappointment.
It is part of my daily life.
I became familiar with it when I was little, before I knew a lot about the adults' salacious games.
But this?
