Just Dance
Ryder Evans (Rhys’s father)
Practicing for our next one?
Is that an invitation? I don’t ask him; instead, I do as I do best and deflect. I can play a game of chicken as well as he does.
Faye
Do you have something else you need to apologize for?
Ryder Evans (Rhys’s father)
Is that the only reason we can dance?
What is he asking? Permission for me to end up in his arms again?
I can’t answer that. Can’t open that door, no matter how much I want to. So, I deflect once more.
Faye
I thought you didn’t go out much
Ryder Evans (Rhys’s father)
Only if it’s worth it
Does he mean me, or the band? I’m pretty sure he means me. I want him to mean me.
He texts again.
Ryder Evans (Rhys’s father)
I have to put this tiger to bed. I’ll let you know if I have more questions before our trip. Goodnight, Miss Rose
And there it is. The shutdown. The careful step back just when things are getting heated. He gives me glimpses of possibility, then retreats before either of us can do something we might regret.
Or might not regret, which is the scarier option.
It’s confusing. This push and pull, the way he draws me in and then steps back, leaves me wanting.
Or I waited too long to reply, and he was worried he’d pushed too hard. Who knows? With him, nothing is certain. The ground keeps shifting.
Faye
Night, Mr. Evans. Any doubts, I’m always available
I leave that door open on purpose, subtext: It’s okay to text me.
Faye
Kiss Rhys goodnight for me
I don’t know why I add that last part. It’s too familiar, too intimate. Asking him to kiss his son for me implies a level of connection we don’t have. But the words are already sent, hanging in the digital space between us.
Ryder Evans (Rhys’s father)
Lucky him
