Even so, sometimes when she closed her eyes Thalia swore she could still feel the rocky coastline beneath her feet. Feel the way the smooth stones would massage her soles as she walked along the shore with her mother, the scent of buttered pastries and brine of the sea wafting through the summer’s breeze.
“I am sorry for that, truly. Have you never returned?” He leaned in again, ever so slightly, and her heart fluttered at the motion.
“The laws are very different in Anatole than in the isles. The people on the eastern continent do not believe in the same power that we do—they do not worship the god that gifts seers their ability. To them it is only a curse.” To her as well—this power would only ever be a curse.
“Maybe one day that will change,gatáki. Maybe one day you will return.”
Sighing, Thalia leaned back in her seat even more, letting her head rest atop the couch back. “You would know all about changing traditions wouldn’t you?”
“What exactly do you mean?” he asked, cocking his head to the side like a young pup.
“Perhaps this is not the time to bring up the prince’s shortcomings,”Mykonos hissed.
“I heard about your trysts in Nexos, how they led to one of your kind being shunned from her pack, shut off from the bond you wolves seem to treasure so much all because, what? You did notthink you would learn to love her? There is more to a partnership than the infatuation people call love.” It had pained Thalia more than she cared to admit when Alexander told her the story of her brother and his betrothed. To be exiled from one’s pack must feel the same as when a seer was cut off from theirpsychí. Gods, the wine must be going to her head if she dared bring this up, but the mention of returning home had sunk in her heart faster than a stone in the sea and perhaps she wanted someone to wallow in the tides with her.
“I feel terrible about what happened with Marianna, that I led her on with no intention of going through with our arrangement, but how would you feel knowing your entire life was planned out for you? That you had no say in what you did? Couldn’t even choose who you love? What type of life is that?” Dimitris pinched the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut, before letting out a pained breath. “When I refused the engagement I did not realize it meant she would be exiled from the pack. It was the first time in our history that had happened. If it is any consolation I really am sorry that she was caught in the crossfire of my decision, but I refuse to be sorry about doing the one singular thing I actually had control over.”
Thalia swallowed a large sip of wine, hoping it would dislodge the lump in her throat, but even the smooth burn of alcohol could not take away the feeling that ate at her insides. For over twenty years, her life had been decided for her. There was no free will when you were given to the temples of Delphine and she certainly had not gained any back when she was taken by the Lernaen Legion. It wasn’t until Alexander gave her the opportunity to be free, to decide what she wanted to do, who she wanted to be, that she had avoice for herself. Was Dimitris’s choice any different than her own? Could she hate him for wanting the same things in life that she did—the ability to be free?
“You really didn’t know…what would happen to her?” Thalia said, barely in a whisper.
“I didn’t. Marianna understood why I did it and, although it took time to process, she forgave me. It is only my siblings who never did.” Dimitris’s hands clenched into tight fists and Thalia could have sworn his eyes went glassy. “It is easy for Alexander. He loves the woman he’s been bound to since he was a child. He never had to fight for the ability to love, never felt the emptiness of knowing the one you were meant to be with was still out there. The longing to be with a person who is continuously out of your reach.”
“Do you think you’ll ever find them? The person that fills that hole in your heart?” She wasn’t even sure why she wanted to know, only that the way the words he spoke were everything she felt on the inside and never had the courage to say out loud.
Dimitris rose from his seat. “I—it is getting late. I should go.” He leaned down and took her hand in his, bringing it to his lips, grazing her with the lightest of kisses. “Thank you, Thalia, for the drink.”
This time she wanted to ask him to stay, to tell her more. But instead he slipped out of her door without another word and Thalia was only left with the buzzing phantom of his lips along her skin.
Chapter Twelve
Thalia
Sunlight warmed every inch of exposed skin despite the crisp wind nipping at her nose and cheeks. Sweat clung to Thalia’s back, absorbing into the fur-lined leathers she wore now that the winter’s chill covered the isle. A similarly lined band covered her ears from the harsh climate, while thin gloves protected her hands from going stiff. With each stomp of her boots, metal spikes she’d attached to the bottom of her soles cut and gripped the ice and snow so she didn’t slip on the treacherous surface. Pumping her arms harder, Thalia took off into a sprint, winding her way through the pine trees, launching over fallen logs and broken roots. The bite of the air caused a glassy sheen to her eyes and a burn inher lungs, but the pain that came with running was better than any she felt recently from those dying crossing over.
Onyx fur caught her eye up ahead, bounding just out of reach on a parallel trail to her right, the creature’s large paws allowing it to push just a little faster than she was able to go. The trees thickened as she chased the animal further into the woods, unable to reach it. A preternatural urge to pull her bow and an arrow out of her quiver overwhelmed Thalia and she had to keep reminding herself the goal was not to shoot the majestic beast down, merely catch it, trap it, beat it.
Every step made her muscles tense, becoming weaker by the moment, but she pushed through the agony. This kind of pain was fleeting, something that could be healed with a steaming cup of tea and a bath filled with healing salts. It was necessary if she was going to be strong enough to fight the soldiers Hades would bring with him now that he had returned. Necessary if she was determined not to fall at the hands of the kind ofdaimonthat had almost killed her in Aidesian.
It would only be a few more steps. The wolf ahead of her had begun to slow, whether it was easing up because it was tired of the chase or had depleted its energy attempting to evade her these last moments didn’t matter. Thalia was close. She pushed harder, exerting every last bit of determination she had in her soul, because it was no longer power or strength she used. No—what drove her now was sheer will.One, two, one, two.Her feet pounded into the earth sending ice and snow flying in their wake.One, two, one, two, draw.Without thought she drew an arrow, planting her feet firmly and drawing back the string of her bow. Onyx fur blurred,disappearing into similarly colored leathers, but those beastly silver eyes remained, staring back at her.
“Were you actually considering firing that bow?” A shifted Dimitris now stood in the middle of her trail, hands on his thighs, bent over and panting.
“I was tired of chasing you. We’ve been running for miles. Don’t worry, I was only planning to pin you to the ground—nothing fatal.” Thalia slid her bow and arrow back into her quiver.
The prince shot her a glare as he stormed over to her that simultaneously caused her to recoil and heat in all the wrong places. Thrusting her back against the trunk of a tree, Dimitris pinned his arm across her throat. “You may be an exceptional hunter, but I assure you, you would not meet your mark.”
Her lip twitched up in a smirk. “I wouldn’t underestimate me,fengaráki,I have never missed. You’d be on your knees begging to be released.”
She swallowed down a lump in her throat as he leaned in closer, those silver, sparkling orbs entrancing her. It was that same flicker she’d seen as he’d planted a kiss on her hand the night before, and it was world-shattering. “I’d gladly drop to my knees before you,gatáki,but it would be you who’d beg for a release.”
Pushing her hand against the prince’s chest, Thalia swatted him away. “You are despicable,” she said, but her voice was lighter than intended.
Dimitris crossed his arms in front of his chest, spinning so he was now the one against the trunk of the tree. That undeniable gaze was now paired with a wicked twitch on his lips. “That’s not what you said on our journey here.”
Spinning away from him, it took every last bit of will to not picture his lips on her neck once more, or his hands traveling her body with the most ungodsly intentions. Every hair on Thalia’s body stood on edge and a chill went up her spine, but she would not turn to face Dimitris. She would not give him the satisfaction that came with the way her chest heaved, or her skin reddened with desire. “It was a brief lapse in judgment…very out of character for me. Don’t expect it to happen again.”
“Whatever you say,gatáki.” He was right behind her once more, so close that his heated breath intertwined with the pieces of her hair that had fallen out of her braid, but not close enough that she could feel him against her. Thalia wanted desperately to have his hard body pressed against hers, taking away that buzzing headache that always lingered.
