I can’t help myself. I type back:
I’m counting on it.
I pause, my thumb hovering over the screen. I want to type more. Letting her know how I can’t stop picturing her lips, how I want her in my bed for real, how this whole thing feels insanebut right. But any time I get close to putting my feelings out there, the guilt sneaks in.
Fucking Purgatory.
Just tell her. Stop being a pussy.
But then the three little dots pop up on my phone…she’s already typing again…and everything else takes a backseat.
Are you working today? Or do you get to play hookie from drawing on naked girls all morning?
I bark out a laugh. For a second, the tension in my chest breaks open and melts away. She really has no idea. Not about Purgatory. Not about my hands on her, a month before I ever knew her name. Not about how much I want her, every second.
I lean over the counter, coffee mug in hand, phone gripped tight. Trying to decide if I want to flirt back or be serious. Instead, I split the difference.
I have to open the shop soon, but I could be convinced to pencil in a little study session…
Strictly educational purposes, obviously.
That’ll make her blush. I can practically see her, miles away, rolling her eyes and pulling her hair in front of her face. Fuck, I want to touch her again.
Ben.You’re incorrigible.
And yes, I had to look that up to make sure I knew what it meant exactly.
Okay, now I’m grinning like a maniac. Pretty sure if anyone walked in right now, I’d look deranged.
My thumb hesitates again. For a second, I almost text her the truth…April, there’s something I have to tell you. About that night at Purgatory. The secret I’ve been sitting on for weeks. I want to be honest; I want to be the guy who deserves you.
But what if I fuck everything up? What if she looks at me and sees just another asshole who lied to get what he wanted?
Instead, I tap the phone against the countertop, breathing in slowly.Go for something light…try not to fuck it up.
Are you coming by the shop later? Or I could cook you dinner. Or, hell, you could meet the rest of the freak show I call family; we’re having family game night. If you’re brave enough.
Instant regret.Was that too much? Too soon? Oh well, can’t take it back now.
There’s a pause.
The phone feels heavier than it should, like all my anxiety is packed in the little rectangle. I stare at the sketch in front of me, the lines of the lily blurring as my brain spins.
A minute later, she comes back:
I would love that.
Just let me know what I can bring (besides embarrassing stories about myself).
Relief pours in so fast I have to grab the countertop to stay grounded. I want to warn Arrow to behave, tell Corinne not to scare her off. More than anything, I want to get April right now and keep her with me until there’s no excuse for us to ever be apart again.
Hell, maybe I’m a lost cause.
The clock on the stove blinks at me…shit, I’m going to be late opening if I don’t get moving. I chug the rest of my coffee and grab my stuff. Last check of the phone, and one more message for her.
Can’t wait to see you tonight.
I hope you’re ready to get destroyed at Monopoly.
