My body went still for a second, and I just sat there lookin’ at her, feelin’ everything I had been holdin’ in press against my chest all at once, but I still couldn’t bring myself to say the words out loud.
But I ain’t need to, ’cause the way I looked at her said enough, and I saw it register on her face the second it clicked. Her expression shiftin’ as she took that in without sayin’ another word.
Sha’Nelle’s face changed instantly, and she bit her bottom lip like she was tryna keep herself together. Her eyes flicked over my face like she was piecin’ it all together in real time.
“I ain’t know what else to do,” I whispered, my voice crackin’ before I could stop it. “I just… I fuckin’ lost it.”
The tears came whether I wanted them to or not, and once they started, I couldn’t hold ’em back. My body started to ache while everything I had been keepin’ in finally started comin’ out.
Sha’Nelle moved closer without hesitation and wrapped her arms around me, pullin’ me into her chest like she was shieldin’ me from everything I was goin’ through.
“Hey… calm down,” she murmured, rubbin’ her hand up and down my back. “I got you, bitch. You hear me? I got you.”
I cried into her shoulder, my fingers clutchin’ her shirt while my other hand stayed on my stomach like I needed to feel my baby right here to remind myself that I had somethin’ positive to look forward to.
“What’s understood ain’t even gotta be discussed, bitch,” she added low, her voice soft but serious in a way that made me nod against her.
I tried to pull myself together, draggin’ a breath in like I could calm myself down before I completely lost it, but I ain’t even get the chance to settle before I heard Kay’Lo’s voice right outside the door. It was deep and close, and too familiar for my body not to react to it instantly.
It hit me before I could even think straight, like my heart tightened on its own, and my back straightened a lil’ without me tellin’ it to. My eyes flicked toward the door while everything in me shifted just from hearin’ him that close.
I pulled away from Sha’Nelle and sat up straighter, wipin’ under my eyes quick while I tried to get myself together, my hand goin’ back to my stomach.
The door opened a second later, and Kay’Lo stepped in.
He had on all black from head to toe, with some steel toe boots on like he had been movin’ around all day, takin’ care of shit. The energy on him felt heavy in a way that made the room feel smaller just from him standin’ there.
Sha’Nelle looked at me, then at him, and she ain’t say nothin’ else before she got up.
“I’mma let y’all have that,” she muttered, walkin’ past him and out the room.
He ain’t even look at her…
His eyes stayed locked on me the whole time, and the second the door closed, it was just us.
For a moment, neither one of us said nothin’, but the way he was lookin’ at me made my stomach twist. It wasn’t just from irritation but from somethin’ deeper that I ain’t wanna acknowledge right then.
“Am I allowed to leave the room now? Or am I still bein’ held hostage?” I asked, my voice laced with sarcasm even though my stomach was tight as hell.
He stepped closer, stoppin’ right in front of me, his presence heavy as hell while he looked down at me.
“I’on know,” he said. “Can I trust you not to put my baby in the middle of some more bullshit?”
The words hit harder than I wanted them to, and I felt it instantly.
“Is that all you care about?” I asked, lookin’ up at him, my voice tight.
He tilted his head just a lil’, his expression not changin’. “Would it make sense for me not to give a fuck, Toni?”
“You know that ain’t what I mean, ’Lo,” I replied, my tone sharper now.
“Then say what you mean,” he replied, calm but firm in a way that made me more irritated.
I let out a frustrated breath and shook my head. “You always do this. You always make everything about what you want, and you don’t even see how you treatin’ me right now. You could’ve at least let me know you was gon’ be gone for ten hours straight.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose for a second before lookin’ back at me. “You trippin’.”
“I’m trippin’?” I shot back. “You got me sittin’ in here, and I can’t even walk out my own room, and I’m trippin’?”
