I love how he’s using my body to make himself feel good. To know I could make him feel this good and have something this man needs fills me with pride. Every ounce of pain or discomfort he gifts me in this manner brings me intense pleasure—and him as well. Anyone else would say we’re two fucked up individuals, but they’re wrong. To please this man in this room is the closure we needed. It’s cathartic. It’s healing. It’s... comfort, coming from the last person we ever thought could bring us anything but pain.
It’s here on my knees that it all clicks for me. The pain he’s feeling is too great for words to express properly, so he gives it to someone else. Someone who is strong enough to take it. Someone who can find pleasure in it.
I am his outlet. And because of that, I cup his balls and roll them gently in my hand.
He shudders at my touch and hisses. “I’m getting close.”
I love that I can make him feel this way.
“Open your mouth. Tongue out.”
I do.
“Stay just like that.” A few quick pumps later, and he’s spilling inside my mouth. “Swallow me, baby girl... Ah, yes... Damn.”
Once his orgasm subsides, he pulls himself out of my mouth and releases my hair. He pets me on the head and drags his tongue over my lip. “Are you okay?”
“Yes.”
He lifts me up and onto the examination table. His forehead rests against mine. We’re breathing into each other, and it seems like for once we’re breathing the same air—sharing the last bit of oxygen left.
I breathe out, and he breathes in, passing it back and forth, ensuring each other stay alive. We stare at each other for a while. And it’s the most intense experience of my life.
I finally see him, and I think he might see me. More than enemies, we are people with needs that fit like a puzzle. We each carry pieces with sharp corners and jagged edges can’t fit most places, no matter how hard we’ve tried. We create a truly unique pairing. We may not want to admit we want each other, but there’s no denying we both have needs only the other can fill.
Without words, we come to a silent agreement.
“Today’s my birthday, and my mom forgot—or... was too grief stricken to care. My mother used to make a big deal out of it. She’d cook all my favorite things, dress me up in ridiculous matching clothes, take way too many pictures and sing way too loud.” He laughs softly. “No matter what was going on in life, she was always smiling, bubbly, and her happy self. It’s my first birthday without my dad, and she’s not herself.” He glances at me before looking down at his fidgeting hands, frowning. “I know what you’re thinking. Poor little pack boy, his mommy doesn’t celebrate her grown son’s birthday.’”
“Actually, I wasn’t thinking that at all. I was thinking that it’s gotta be hard—to not only lose your father, but to also feel like you’re losing your mother, too.”
“Exactly. It’s like losing any sense of normalcy. It’s just one more person to grieve. And with everything going on, I haven’t even had a chance to grieve the first loss.”
“Everything else? What else is going on?”
“The council notices that my mom hasn’t been at the meetings lately. She’s weakening and grieving and...” He trails off, then shakes his head, not wanting to say the truth: She’s dying. “Anyway, if the council found out, they’ll assign the position of alpha to someone else.”
I didn’t realize how much pressure he’s under, and it is wrong to assume what’s “hard” for someone else.
“Is that why you’re trying to choose a mate?”
“Yes. Then they won’t have a leg to stand on. But Mom won’t get out of bed most days. It’s only a matter of time before the rest of the pack notices as well.”
I’ve never seen him so... human? Broken? Vulnerable. All I know is that it’s hurting me to see him this way. I reach out to rub his bare chest but hesitate, and Caleb catches me.
“What’re you doing?” He moves away.
I turn my palm face up as if Caleb were a skittish animal. “I was going to try to... comfort you... if that’s okay?”
“Oh.” His eyes soften, his defenses slowly melting away. “O-okay.”
I place my palm on his chest and rub slow, tiny circles in between his pecs.
Unexpectedly, he pulls me into him, and I melt, resting my head on him.
My wolf purrs at our proximity. I thought it’d be awkward, but it feels...nice. Natural.
He wraps an arm around me and rubs my back as well.
